


Respect Doesn't Write History

by EllaAniMine



Category: The Witcher (TV), Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Modern with Magic, Angst and Feels, Eskel saves some poor girl, F/M, Geralt and Eskel are still witchers, Geralt and Jaskier are very in love, Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia Loves Jaskier | Dandelion, Geraskier, Heartbreak, Hurt/Comfort, I know it says Eskel/Original Female character, Indie Artist Jaskier, Jaskier is still Human, M/M, Monsters, Multi, Near Death Experiences, Now they cant get rid of her, Please dont follow random men into bars, Research, Scenting, She has so many questions, The study of History, Touch-Starved Eskel, Touch-Starved Witchers, but its really more of an Eskel & Original Female Character, slow burn i guess
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-30
Updated: 2020-08-13
Packaged: 2021-03-01 20:13:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 22
Words: 25,969
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23932864
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EllaAniMine/pseuds/EllaAniMine
Summary: "Will someone PLEASE explain just what the FUCK I have walked into?"After a near death experience almost kills her, her first choice shouldn't be to follow these strangers deeper into the dangerous world of Monster Hunting. And yet, the lure of adventure and the promise of a study that will shake the foundations of history is too good to pass up.Combined with ambition, a quick wit, and some research skills, this story stands as a testament to what could happen when you truly cannot let something go.OREskel prevents a monster from eating a girl who decides that she wants to study and follow two Witchers and the human musician that's dating one of them. A series of short glimpses into the progression of their lives once they become intertwined.  Witchers find out maybe it is possible for more than one human to see them as people rather than monsters & also get tricked into emoting sometimes.Also, it is nice for Eskel to have someone to hang out with besides his brother and his brother's boyfriend.{{NOT designed as a love story, but there is love in it}}
Relationships: Eskel (The Witcher)/Original Female Character(s), Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia & Jaskier | Dandelion, Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion
Comments: 43
Kudos: 54





	1. Chapter 1

If she had been pressed to say, this wasn’t how she expected or wanted to die. Old age would be preferable, after a long and satisfying life. An accident of some sort was always possible, but came with a lot of messiness. With an accident someone would have to notify her family, and while that was awful at least someone would know what had happened.

But now, behind the building after working uncharacteristically late, no one was around to see what happened to her. Truthfully, she wasn't sure if she would be able to describe it herself, and she was face-to-face with the creature. 

  
The universe moved in slow motion. Her heart had seized as soon as she heard the shuffling. It felt like an eternity as she spun around, and the beast leapt at her in slow motion. It looked part rotten, as though it may have been human at one point, and was clearly out for blood. Before she had a chance to gasp, think, or do much of anything besides get scared shitless; a bright glint descended from above, slashing through the threat before it got close enough to harm. 

  
Something wet splattered against her, all over her face and the front of her shirt. The pure shock stopped her from screaming or reacting much at all, eyes still soaking in the information as it unfolded before her.

Distantly, sound muffled by the slow of time, she heard a gruff voice curse. Suddenly the glint from before became clear, it was a sword, and attached to the other end of it was a man. He was large, larger than any man had the right to be, but perhaps such large muscles and broad shoulders were necessary for swinging swords and slicing creatures in half.

  
The world seemed to speed back up to a quick pace, and as she blinked the shock out of her eyes she watched the man turn away from her, speaking to someone although no one could be seen. "Found it. Nearly bit the head off of some poor girl." He moved quickly, almost gone by the time she was able to move her weak legs. 

  
"Wh-" her voice croaked. "W-Wait!" Running as fast as her legs could carry her, she followed him from behind the building. "What was that?"

  
"I don't have time for this." He barely acknowledged her, just moving quickly. She could see the sword in his hand was not the only one he carried, and something about that scared her although he had just saved her life. She was able to stay close enough to keep him in her sights, but regretted that decision when she saw what he was dealing with. Other creatures, like the one that had almost killed her, were scrambling around. The man and another similarly sized man swung gleaming swords and seemed to quickly dispose of the remaining creatures. Paralyzed with fear, she pressed her back to the wall to protect herself, screwing her eyes closed from the ensuing battle. Without knowing for how long, she stayed there in the relative safety. She gasped and almost screamed when something grabbed her arm.

  
"Who are you?" It was one of the large men who had been fighting the creatures held her by the arm.

  
"I-I..." She struggled to respond. "Becca, er, Rebecca. My name is..." She looked up to the glowing amber eyes, not sure if it was the man himself or the residual fear that kept her paralyzed. His pale hair hung in his eyes, but he didn't make any move as he regarded her. "What was that?" 

  
"Go home." He let her go, turning away. "Best not to get involved." 

  
Both men turned to leave her behind without much more care and suddenly the fear turned into something akin to anger. She rushed after them, but they were either to far ahead to hear her or just didn't care.

  
"Wait! You can't just leave me hanging!" She called. "Hey! What the fuck _WAS_ all of that?" She continued this way until she saw them slip into a alley. She stopped on the sidewalk a moment to consider what she was about to do.

  
Chasing after scary men was not usually a priority for Becca. In fact, it was about the furthest thing from what she liked to do. It wasn't safe and it wasn't smart, but given the circumstances of all that had happened she felt as though she might be entitled to answers. Mustering all of the courage she had, Becca turned the corner into the alley and stormed through the door at the end of it.

  
There's no telling what she had expected. Truth be told, she hadn't given much thought to what she might be walking into, but certainly a dressing room with just one regular sized man sitting in front of the mirror hadn't been it. She tried to think of something to say, but before anything came to mind she was suddenly self conscious of the mess she must have looked like covered in... Whatever had been inside of that monster.

  
"Wh- I..." Becca stumbled, trying dumbly to speak. Before she got a word in, another door burst open, revealing the huge white haired man from before.

  
"You?" He grunted. He took a step toward her, but the other man who was sat at before the mirror jumped between them.

  
"Geralt," he spoke, unreasonably calm for all of the commotion. "Settle down, love."

  
"What's happening?" Another gruff voice joined the fray and the other huge man from before was suddenly in the room. "Ah fuck, what is she doing here?"

  
In the light she could see both of them better, and could see the litany of scars over their bodies. She distantly heard the sounds of arguing but was too confused to follow the exchange.   
When the arguing escalated to shouting she cut in with something that silenced all of them.

  
"Will someone _PLEASE_ explain just what the _FUCK_ I have walked into?" 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Listen, Becca..." Jaskier tried again to calm her. "Have you... Have you ever heard of a Witcher?"
> 
> "No?" Becca looked at him with confusion written all over her face.
> 
> "A Witcher fights monsters." He explained. "REAL monsters. And you're quite lucky these two were there tonight, or you would have been a sorry sight come morning."
> 
> OR  
> Jaskier is the only one that is good at talking to people. Also, some of the answers start to come out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Listen...  
> I'm doing this all by myself for fun.  
> So if there are typos or confusing things I'm sorry, I guess my college degree really was as useless as they told me it would be.  
> Also, it means a lot to me that you are reading anyway.

Sitting ramrod straight on the stool, Rebecca sipped nervously at her Sprite with cranberry. She wasn't sure yet what made her more nervous, the hulking men on her left and right, that she was no longer wearing her own shirt, or that she had to wait a second encore before she could begin to hope for answers.

  
It 'wouldn't be but a moment,' he had assured her. Well, the reasonably sized man had neglected to mention that he was going to be performing before he left her alone with those two. He had pressed a large T-shirt into her hands, introduced himself as Julien something or other, and explained that he would be sure to help answer her questions just as soon as he was able.

  
That left her with the two men, who seemed uninterested in doing anything besides keeping one eye on her and having their own drinks. They had ordered beer or something, offered one to her but she insisted she didn't want any alcohol. Becca had a feeling she would need all of her wits about her to understand just what had occurred that evening. 

  
Soon enough the crowd roared to life again and Julien-whoever bowed and waved and made his way off stage. A moment later the white haired man got up and walked toward the backstage door. Becca set her soda down and moved to follow him, but a rough hand grabbed her shoulder and plopped her back onto the stool, placing her drink back in her hands. "Wait." Was all the other said.

  
She looked at him more now, even in the dim lighting of the bar she could see enough.   
Brown hair, long enough to partially obscure his eyes from this angle, a strong jaw, and rugged face that was marred by a few deep scars running over the right side. He was at least a head taller than her, and although he towered over her she wasn't afraid per se. His eyes, strange and intriguing, scanned the crowd on the lookout but he seemed relaxed.

  
Likewise, her companion took stock of her as well. She was small by comparison, but not slight, leaning more on the side of full bodied rather than whatever twinky silouette was considered 'fashionable' these days. Her features, though wrung as they were with concern, were not unattractive. She had a somewhat girlish beauty, face round and cheeks soft. Her eyes, whether naturally or not, were wide, although he couldn't determine what shade. Her hair was a little longer than shoulder length, light, maybe blond or light brown. It didn't matter, as soon as she had her answer she's be out of their hair. There was no sense in making friends. 

  
At least now she didn't smell like the sharp bite of fear anymore. The slightly sour smell of concern, sure, and still faintly of ghoul guts, but those were more manageable. 

  
"Um, I didn't... I didn't catch your name earlier." Becca cleared her throat. She didn't dare look at him anymore, the whole situation was embarrassing enough.

  
"What's it matter?" He responded. "Not gonna be friends."

  
They sat in silence for just a bit longer.

  
"My name's Becca." She spoke again.

  
"I heard."

  
Silence again.

  
"You're not much of a talker, I guess."

  
"Hmm."

  
Fortunately the slow torture was ended by the return of white-hair and singer-whoever. The singer approached quickly and grasped her by the shoulder. He had the good nature to give her a softer sympathetic look as he glanced over her.

  
"Didn't they get you a drink?" He asked first.

  
"Well, I... I don't drink during the week." Becca responded. "Alcohol, I mean."

  
"It's a Friday night though." He furrowed his brow. At no sign of reconsideration he pressed on. "Well alright, why don't we head back toward the dressing room and we'll get this whole thing sorted, yeah?"  
Feeling just a bit more relaxed, somewhat magically, Becca nodded her head and followed him. He kept the gentlest hand on her shoulder or arm as reassurance and although she couldn't express it, Becca was thankful. 

  
Once they were back in the dressing room, things were a bit quieter. The two of them sat in chairs opposite each other and the two tall men hung back but within the vicinity.

  
"So..." He began breaking the faint ice that threatened to encapsulate them all. "You don't have to worried. I'm Julian, but everyone close to me just calls me Jaskier." He smiled. "You can call me Jaskier too."

  
"Jaskier..." The name sounded familiar, but the memory was too distant at the moment. "Everyone I know calls me Becca."

  
"Becca," he nodded. "Well there's no need to worry, my brutish friends are not nearly as mean as they seem. That tall, white-haired dreamboat is Geralt. And the other roguishly handsome man is Eskel. Believe me, they wouldn't do a single thing to hurt you."

  
"Okay..." She mumbled. Jaskier looked at her with a soft smile. With voice barely above a whisper he pressed on. "What happened, Becca?"

  
"I don't know, I... I was leaving work, I work at the museum, and as I was locking the back door I heard this noise. And before I could do anything, this... this THING is jumping at me, and he," She gestured to the doorframe, "Eskel, I guess? He was there, and he had this sword and he cut it in half and I, I got..." Becca gestured to herself where she had been painted with guts not a few hours earlier. "I tried to ask what was going on, but he left before I could... And I ran after, but suddenly there were more creatures, and there was two of them! And I followed them all the way here looking for answers, but..." Becca looked almost pathetically towards Jaskier again. 

  
"What is going on?" She croaked, tears threatening to spill.

  
"Hey, shhhh, it's okay." Jaskier rubbed her shoulder. "That sounds terrible, I'm so sorry." After a moment he regarded the two men. "What was it?"

  
"An Alghoul tried to eat her." Eskel supplied. "There was a whole group of ghouls, that one must've smelled her and thought she'd be a good meal. Fortunately I killed it before it got to her. Made quick work of the rest."

  
"Wh-what?" Becca shuddered. "Who are you?"

  
"Listen, Becca..." Jaskier tried again to calm her. "Have you... Have you ever heard of a Witcher?"

  
"No?" Becca looked at him with confusion written all over her face.

  
"A Witcher fights monsters." He explained. "REAL monsters. And you're quite lucky these two were there tonight, or you would have been a sorry sight come morning."

  
"So... So those two are these Witchers?" She questioned. "But, the swords?"

  
"Silver." Geralt spoke. "Kills ghouls."

  
Becca couldn't believe what she was hearing. Not only were monsters real, they could and would kill you, and these two were the monster hunters. She had so many more questions, her mind was racing.

  
"The best thing for you," Jaskier spoke up again. "Is to stay far away from this. It's not safe. Okay?"

  
"But... But..."

  
"How old are you?" Jaskier asked.

  
"Twenty-Three. I finished college just last-"

  
"You've got your whole life ahead of you." Jaskier said. "You don't need to be getting mixed up in all of this. Okay?" The silence stretched as Becca looked at the three of them in disbelief. Jaskier pressed again, "Okay?"

  
"Sure." She finally answered. Apparently satisfied by that result, Jaskier relaxed just a bit. 

  
"Sorry about your shirt." He offered. "You can hang onto the fan-shirt as consolation."

  
"Thanks." Becca responded.

  
"I'll take you home," Jaskier offered. "If you want." 

  
"I have a car, I just..." Becca stumbled to push the rest out. Seeming to understand, Jaskier patted her on the knee and stood.

  
"I'll walk you to your car."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yeah....  
> as a word of advice, please do NOT follow random men into bars. Even if they did just save you from monsters. 
> 
> These are not aspirational decisions.  
> It gets worse before it gets better. She's so dumb. pls don't do that. I cannot be responsible.
> 
> Also, Jaskier is like... in his 20's so they are peers.  
> Yes. Yes it is very hypocritical of him.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I came for answers." She stated firmly.
> 
> "You got them already. Nothing else to tell." He turned to leave her again, but she snapped quickly before he got the chance.
> 
> "But Witchers don't exist!" 
> 
> He stopped dead in his tracks, turning slowly to look back at her. If he looked angry before he looked downright leathal now. "What?" He spat.
> 
> OR  
> Apparently the four of them need to have this conversation again, in a bit more detail. Evidently the first message of "STAY AWAY" wasn't clear enough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so,  
> I said it before, but please please do not take anything that is about to happen as inspiration.
> 
> I know this girl is supposed to have a college degree, but hey...  
> Who among us do not lose 80% of our smarts when face to face with some brooding, muscular, men? Or, you know, a mystery in desperate need of solving?

It had been days since that night. 

Every spare moment since Becca had dedicated to searching and scouring, even wildly texting Jaskier which was absolutely NOT what he had left her with his number for. 

She needed answers, and when every path she tried turned up with nothing it became apparent she needed to go straight to the source.

She knew Jaskier would be playing in the bar again that night. If he was there, that meant maybe one of those other two would be there and she could ask the questions she had been too shaken up to ask a little over a week ago. She got a Sprite with cranberry again, not willing to risk the influence of alcohol. She looked sharply for either one of the men who would be able to answer her questions. Jaskier had only been playing about half an hour, but it had felt like an eternity already. 

Just as her spirits were flagging a bit, Becca spotted him approaching the bar. She jumped up and began pushing through patrons to reach him. She was a couple people away, so close, but he was turning to walk away. She couldn't lose him.

"Eskel!" She called out. He stiffened at his name, but groaned when he realized where it came from. By that point Becca had managed to push past the few people that separated them and stood before Eskel. 

"What are you doing here?" He asked.

"I came for answers." She stated firmly.

"You got them already. Nothing else to tell." He turned to leave her again, but she snapped quickly before he got the chance.

"But Witchers don't exist!" 

He stopped dead in his tracks, turning slowly to look back at her. If he looked angry before he looked downright leathal now. "What?" He spat.

"I looked. I searched and searched for it, but I couldn't find anything about Witchers, or monster hunters, or much of anything I was told." She explained. "Nothing real." 

"Are you calling me a liar?" Eskel hissed.

"I need to know the truth." Becca was firm. They stood facing one another. Despite how he towered over her and the dangerous look on his face, she didn't look or smell like fear. Determination mostly, with a hint of desperation.

"Look at me." He bent down so he was eye to eye with her. "Witchers are real. I know, because I am one. That's all you need to know."

"But it's not!" Becca cried. "How do I know? How do I know you're telling the truth? What does it MEAN to be a Witcher? Why do you fight monsters? How can you? What if-" She suddenly stopped to catch her breath. "Eskel, I'm alive because of you. I'm alive for a reason. I don't know, destiny intervened or whatever, but what I do know is... Is that I need answers. So this time when I ask don't keep anything from me."

Eskel looked at her a long time. Becca couldn't make out the look on his face, either because of the dim lighting or because of the impassable mask he wore. Finally he spoke again.

"I won't answer your questions." He said. Just as Becca geared up to fight him again, he held up a hand that shut her up. "Not here. It's too public, and anyway you'll ruin the night if you don't shut up."

"Wait, but then when-?"

"Later." That was all he said. He turned to leave and Becca stepped to follow. "What, you're following me now?"

The indignant response she thought to give died in her throat. Instead, all she said was, "you might try to avoid me later."

With a grunt he dropped it, but looked down to Becca's empty hands. "No drink?"

"I had a Sprite back at the table..." She turned but stopped when Eskel spoke. 

"Leave it, someone's probably put something in it by now." He turned back to the bar and made a few gestures to the bartender, not that Becca could descipher any of them, and shortly there was another pink drink on the bar. Eskel passed it to her without preamble. He began to walk away. Becca scrambled to follow. She took a big sip of the drink and coughed in surprise.

"This has vodka in it!" 

Eskel smirked. He looked down at her, "I know. You need to lighten up."

Becca had half a mind to tell him something akin to 'don't tell me to lighten up you sour faced asshole!' but he wouldn't have been able to hear her anyway over the cheer from the crowd. Or so she thought.  
Eskel finally stopped by a table at the corner, a secluded place with only one other figure, back pressed against the wall. He passed a bottle to the other man, tapping their necks together before sipping on his own. The silent exchange the two had would have gone unnoticed even if Becca hadn't been ignoring them in favor of watching Jaskier.

The three waited without talking to each other until Jaskier's set was well and truly over. Then, just as before, Geralt left them to meet with Jaskier backstage. 

After a beat, Becca turned to Eskel. "What's their deal anyway?"

Eskel grunted, "they're..."

"Together?" Becca supplied.

"Hm." Was all Eskel responded. He drank the rest of his beer, and Becca nursed her mystery drink. After what felt like an interminably long time to Becca, and not long enough to Eskel, she opened her mouth to speak. "Don't." Was all he said. "Later." And went back to drinking his beer. 

The crowd thinned out a bit, and still they waited. Fortunately for Eskel, Becca didn't make an effort at small talk. 'Good,' he thought to himself. The less she tried to get involved the better. Finally, with a walk that looked almost panicked, Jaskier approached them. His face was almost pale and drawn in a dumbfounded look.

"Jaskier! I'm-"

"What's going on? Are you okay?" He looked her over, searching for what Becca wasn't sure.

"Yeah, no, I'm fine." She sat the drink down on the table. "Listen, I'm sorry for spamming you, and I realize what this looks like but..."

"It's... Fine." He said, even though his tone said it kind of wasn't. "I didn't know what to do anyway."

"I just need some answers." Becca said, sincerely. "I tried to find them myself but, there's nothing."

"She said Witchers don't exist." Eskel added. 

"Don't exist?" Jaskier was in disbelief.

"They do exist." Geralt grunted.   
"Then tell me! Tell me about it. What is a Witcher? Where do they come from? Why is there no record of them, or any of the monsters they fight existing?"

"Whoa, hey, quiet down!" Jaskier cut in. "Maybe, it's best not to get-"

"I won't leave until you tell me." Her face set in determination. She was all determination, but no fear. She hadn't smelled like fear since she had come down from almost being eaten.  
The three men looked between each other, sharing looks back and forth until suddenly Jaskier looked back at Becca and smiled tensely.   
"I think it's best if we go somewhere else." He said.

~~

"Mutated." Becca parroted back. "Witchers are... Mutated?"

"Yeah." Geralt responded. He leaned against the desk that Jaskier sat at. 

"W-When? How?"

"As children mostly." Eskel answered from across from her. "There are trials. Brutal trials that make us what we are." He looked her in the eye so she could see what the trials had done to him. "Not everyone survives."

"But when did... When were YOU, you know... Changed?"

"Fuck, I dunno..." Eskel looked to Geralt. "80 years ago?" 

"80?" Becca looked shocked between the two of them before scoffing. "No. No you're lying. There's no way."

"The mutations make us live longer..." Geralt supplied. 

"So you're telling me, that you are mutated, basically immortal, and you swing big swords around to kill monsters that no one but you knows anything about?" 

"Pretty much." Eskel responded.

"And how long has this whole, situation been going on?" 

"You mean how long have there been Witchers?" Eskel looked at her. She nodded. "Who knows. Centuries? Millennia? It's hard to say."

"But then..." Becca furrowed her brow trying to reconcile this information. "Why is there no record of you? No one's studied or even acknowledged that you exist?"

"The world likes to ignore anything that it doesn't like." Geralt sighed. "It's not our fault if no one noticed or bothered to care about our existence. We know what we are, what we’re meant to do.”

The conversation ended for a moment, fading into quiet as the four of them sat there. Becca could feel an incredible weight lifting off of her, but a new one was sliding in to take its place. Now that she knew this information, what was she supposed to do with it? It didn’t benefit her in any way to know that there were monsters in the world, and the knowledge of these men created to fight them was a bit less comforting than it ought to have been. Looking around, taking in the look of all of them, believing what they told her, finally she landed on Jaskier.

“What about you?” She asked, hardly audible. "How do you fit into all of this?"

"I'm... Well the why isn't important, but I found myself wrapped up in all of this and," Jaskier paused, thinking. "Well you should know that Geralt and I-"

"Are together, yeah I got that." Becca actually chuckled at that. "Sneaking off to see you before anyone else is allowed to, you're not exactly being super subtle."

"I wasn't trying to be." Jaskier gave her a little half smile back.

"So, is that really all?" Looking between the two Witchers, Becca spoke again. "You've told me everything I need to know? You wouldn't lie to me?"

"That's everything." Eskel answered. "All you asked for."

There was quiet again.

"I'll walk you to your car?" Jaskier offered.

"No, no it's okay." Becca responded with a weak smile. "I can do it. I'll be on my way." She stood, being sure she had what she needed. "I guess, I'm out of your hair then."

"I guess."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Listen,   
> What Jaskier and Geralt are doing alone after those shows is up to you.
> 
> Also, I realized as I was posting this that it was probably super dumb and irresponsible to let her have an alcoholic drink and then say she was going to drive home.
> 
> Let's just assume that, for safety reasons, 1) she didn't drink like any of it, and 2) you should not ever try to live like this protag.   
> but why would you want to?


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "So, what are you doing?" He looked at her with just a touch of concern.
> 
> "I'm, uh..." She glanced around, trying to find a plausible excuse. "I'm just,"
> 
> "You can't leave it alone, can you?" The look on Jaskier's face was almost sympathetic. He glanced away, to the building they were standing in front of. "I understand that."
> 
> OR  
> She had a really good reason to show up again. She swears! And, by the way, it was totally normal for her to show up there.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two chapters in one day??   
> I know, it's exciting.
> 
> I also realize this won't matter to literally anyone in the future, but I'm a good number of chapters ahead and I've just written a very part, so let me have this?
> 
> I still stand by that you should absolutely not do anything that is happening in this fic.

"What am I doing?" She mumbled to herself. This was her worst idea yet. Honestly, who was she? The pre-near-death experience Becca would have run from that bar with all of that petrifying information and never looked back. Witchers be damned, she didn't need to know about it! Seeking out muscle bound danger was the precise opposite of what she liked to do, and yet here she was, tracking it down with the most pathetic detective skills ever. She should leave. Standing outside of this building, she looked so stupid, not walking up to the door and just standing on the sidewalk.

  
"Uh, Becca?" The voice sounded concerned. "What, what are you doing?"

  
"Oh," It was Jaskier. "Jaskier, I... I was just-"

  
"Did you... follow me here?"

  
"What? No," she really hadn't followed him. He had drinks in his hands, she definitely hadn't gone to any coffee shops. "Of course not, that would make me look crazy right?" A little laughter should throw him off. 

  
"Uh huh." Jaskier agreed with her, chuckling just a bit. "So, what are you doing?" He looked at her with just a touch of concern.

  
"I'm, uh..." She glanced around, trying to find a plausible excuse. "I'm just,"

  
"You can't leave it alone, can you?" The look on Jaskier's face was almost sympathetic. He glanced away, to the building they were standing in front of. "I understand that."

  
"I feel..." Becca sighed, looking to the building as well. "Like I can't walk away. Like... I'm on the cusp of something."

  
"Adventure..." Jaskier breathed, so quiet it was barely heard. "Well whatever the reason, no sense standing outside. You're already here," Looking back to Becca he shook his head. "For better or worse."   
They walked up the stairs in tandem, Jaskier chatting to her, "if I'd known you were coming I would have gotten you a coffee or tea as well." 

  
"That's okay, I don't really like hot coffee. Not much of a tea drinker either, to be honest."

  
They laughed and smiled as they reached the top of the stairs, and noting his lack of free hands Becca held the door open for him. Before the door even had time to close, "JASKIER!"

  
"Oh no..." Jaskier wilted a bit. "Geralt I can explain!"

  
"What is she doing here?" Eskel entered the foyer from a room off to the side. "Did you bring her here?"

  
"Wh-no! I just found her outside!" Jaskier insisted. Geralt appeared somehow from behind, and startled Becca. 

  
"Then how did she get here?" Geralt asked.

  
"I don't know!" Jaskier insisted. "I just went to get the three of us some drinks from the cafe, and she was standing outside when I got back!"

  
"I found this place myself." Becca said calmly. Suddenly both Witchers were looking at her. The unspoken 'how' hung in the air. "I followed Jaskier on Instagram."

  
"Aw, really?" Jaskier softened. "Do you like my content?"

  
"It's not the time, Jas." Geralt commented. He looked back to Becca, signaling for her to continue.

  
"Well, I noticed the number of times Jaskier checked in to the cafe down the block. He had to be coming to something around the area a lot, so... I used find my friends to figure out where he was walking to." The three of them looked at her like she'd sprung a second head. "I know it was kind of shady and underhanded but-!"

  
"What are you even doing here?" Eskel asked. "We told you everything you wanted to know."

  
"I know, but-"

  
"You can't just walk in here." Geralt added. "This is our... You can't be here."

  
"You did answer my questions! But I... I just..." Becca paused and looked around with a kind of resignation. "Listen, if Witchers have been around for as long as you say they have, no one has done any writing about them. Now I can tell you're kind of hush-hush about all of it, but it's clearly not that big of a deal if people know about it! I mean, I know about it now. And Jaskier knows, and he's human!" She shrugged, trying to think of what else she could say to convince them. She continued, hands up, trying to be somewhat soothing. "Whether no one written about Witchers because they haven't been able to research them, or no one knows they exist, or simply that no one cared enough... I care. And I want to do it. I want to research, and interview you, and start to catalogue the existence and the History of Witchers! I'm really good at research, I got a research fellowship while I was in school! An undergraduate research fellowship is really good! And I mean, do you have any idea what something like this could do for me? For my career?" She looked at them in earnest for a moment.

  
"I swear." She all but whispered. "I won't write anything that I don't ask permission about first. And I won't say anything, or submit anything publicly without showing you." They stood around silently. No one said anything, and not a single movement gave any indication if her speech had convinced them or not.

  
"Gentlemen, if I may?" Jaskier spoke up after the silence had stretched a little too long. "You've seen that look in her eyes before. That determination, that drive... You know where it leads." Jaskier knew the other two recognized he meant to reference himself. "It can't be left alone. At least this way, you get to control the narrative."

  
"Please," Becca insisted. "You'll barely notice me. I won't be but silent backdrop."

  
"Where have I heard that before?" Geralt looked pointedly at Jaskier, who ignored him completely.

  
"Well, I for one will not be turning her away." Jaskier stepped up, as if to show literally that he was backing Becca up. "She's a good girl. I can tell." Jaskier said. "And I am an excellent judge of character. I judged you both right."

  
Both Witchers were silent again, weighing all of the new information. Their silence was long, and when Becca was almost convinced they would refuse her Geralt grumbled again.

  
"Fine." He said. "But no more showing up unannounced."

  
"Really?" Becca exclaimed. "I mean, thank you. You won't regret it."

  
"You better hope not." Eskel spoke up. "And you better hope this research is worth it. It's certainly not going to be easy for you.”

  
“I’ve got time.” She looked almost excited, but at least made an effort to school her expression into something more subdued. “After work and on days off, that is. I still have a job.”

  
“Where do you work?” Jaskier asked.

  
“At the museum downtown. I’m a tour guide slash teach programs. It’s... a start.” Becca smiled. “Did you all want to visit? I can get you in no problem.”

  
“No.” Both Geralt and Eskel answered, turning away to leave her.

  
“We’ll see.” Jaskier responded, softly patting Becca’s shoulder.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And there you have it.
> 
> I feel like it shouldn't be surprising to anyone that She and Jaskier are going to get on like a house on fire.
> 
> Also, to placate my heart and emotions, it would be great, if you felt so moved, if I could read a comment or so. I'd really love to know what's working, or not working, or what you are feeling or maybe expecting.  
> or even just knowing if my attempts at comedy are landing.
> 
> I promise I will be very nice.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Yeah, back in boyhood when everything was... Simpler." Eskel's gaze drifted off to the side. "Before fighting every monster would take a pound of flesh as payment."
> 
> "You mean your scars?" The tone of their conversation had turned somber. Becca knew that she was treading in dangerous ground, but even so she couldn't stop the next words as they tumbled out of her mouth. "Did a monster give you those scars on your face?"
> 
> OR  
> Sometimes, despite their best efforts, humans can still unintentionally wound. The first interview goes off the rails.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright listen,  
> There has to be some drama. No one is perfect, and least of all someone who at any given moment has the faintest grasp on what she is dealing with.
> 
> I don't like it any more than you do! but the plot has to progress somehow, and we have already established that you should not follow the example of this protag. 
> 
> So, just try to suffer through for a minute, okay? I swear it doesn't last forever.

They were sitting there in silence. Becca was never very good with silence. It was like something was always compelling her to fill it, and that usually meant babbling. But for once she had no idea what to say.

  
“Do you... want a cookie?” She asked.

  
“No.” Eskel responded. He was looking in a book, skimming as they sat there. 

  
“Do you not like cookies?” She asked. “Is it because they’re chocolate chip? I just thought that was a safe kind, but it’s okay if you don’t like them.”

  
“Don’t care.” Eskel said. It’s like he was trying to ignore her.

  
“I can bring something different next time.” Becca shifted.

  
“Don’t bring any cookies.” Eskel looked at her. “Okay? You don’t have to be so Becky Home-ecky. It’s not gonna help you.”

  
“Okay. I just... Nevermind.” Becca tried to brush it off and smile. “Can I interview you now?”

  
“That’s what you’re here for.” He didn’t look up from the book. Becca pulled a few things from her bag and set up a bit on the coffee table between them. She moved the plate of cookies closer to him as she rearranged things. Eskel watched out of the corner of his eye until she seemed to settle and be ready. With a pencil poised in a fresh notebook, Becca cleared her throat. 

  
“So, I’ll start off pretty easy.” She began, looking to Eskel. “Tell me about killing monsters.”

  
“What do you wanna know?”

  
“Whatever.” She said. “Whatever you want, whatever you can think of.”

  
“That’s not very specific.” He glanced at her. 

  
“Then... why do you use swords?” She asked. “Plenty of other, easier to manage, weapons.”

  
“Sword is a good weapon. Effective.” Eskel continued looking in his book. “It’s worked for centuries and will keep working for centuries more.”

  
“Okay.” Becca worked to scribble that down quickly. The soft scratch of pencil seemed to be the only silence Eskel would get. “So, why do you need to carry two swords?”

  
“One’s silver, one’s not.”

  
“Why do you need both?”

  
“Can’t use silver for everything.” The pencil was scratching again.

  
“Have you ever tried using anything else?”

  
“Yup. Didn’t work.”

  
“So, swords it remains.”

  
“Swords it remains.”

  
“Is it hard?” She asked. "You know, swinging swords around every day?"

  
"No. Not anymore."

  
"Anymore?"

  
"I had to learn how to. Training was hard, but... We push through."

  
"How were you trained?" Becca leaned forward. When he didn't answer after a moment, she pulled back. "Nevermind. It was a dumb question."

  
He clearly didn't want to talk about it. It wouldn't do any good to push him so early in the process, it could only make him clam up and refuse to talk to her about anything at all. Becca wracked her brain for something else. She closed the notebook, setting it and her pencil down on the table.

  
"Off the record... How did you meet Geralt?" She grabbed a cookie from the plate. Just because Eskel didn't want any didn't mean she couldn't have any. "You know, just how do you know each other?"

  
"We grew up together." Eskel said, matter of factly. "We trained together. We learned together. We went through everything together. Hell, we even got in trouble together." Eskel chuckled a bit at that. "This one time, we pulled a prank so bad we both got our asses whipped to high hell for it. It's still funny to this day." Eskel closed his book and gave his attention to Becca. "Geralt and I-"

  
"You're brothers." She smiled. "Of course. I should have seen it, the sibling rivalry and relationship is written all over."

  
"Hm." Eskel leaned back in his chair.

  
"I get it. I mean, obviously I don't get it, clearly we had very different childhoods. But what I mean is, I have a brother too. So I get the... The sibling thing. You know?" She talked too much. And she knew she talked too much. But it was just so hard to stop once she got going. "Yeah, he's older than me, but uh... We were close in age so it was always like, this huge competition. Polar opposites though. He's um, uh... Nevermind."

Clearly talking about herself wasn't getting anywhere, it just made Eskel look a bit more annoyed. "Anyway. What... what was the prank you pulled." She ate her cookie to shut herself up.

  
"It was, uh." Eskel thought about it, but descided that telling that story would give away too much. "It was nothing." The soft 'oh.' from across the coffee table was the only other sound for a while. "This one time though, we tied a jar onto a forest bee. Watched the damn thing swing around until we got cuffed in the ears." Eskel almost smiled.

  
Becca may not have known how you could tie a jar onto a little bee, but she wasn't about to say anything and spoil the first thing close to a good mood he had seemed to be in since she's met him.

  
"Sounds like it was pretty funny." 

  
"Yeah, back in boyhood when everything was... Simpler." Eskel's gaze drifted off to the side. "Before fighting every monster would take a pound of flesh as payment."

  
"You mean your scars?" The tone of their conversation had turned somber. Becca knew that she was treading in dangerous ground, but even so she couldn't stop the next words as they tumbled out of her mouth. "Did a monster give you those scars on your face?"

  
The air turned cold, and everything was silent. She regretted those words with every part of her as soon as she said them. The scent of sadness and regret rolled off of her, but it didn't soften Eskel.

  
"Yeah, a monster gave them to me." He said, deathly quiet. "The worst kind of monster. The human kind." Becca tried to apologize, but the words were stuck in her throat. Eskel stood up, the armchair he had been sitting in scraping on the wood floor as he stood. "Interrogation is over." 

  
He left.

  
The door slamming a ways off made her shudder. Becca sat there for a long time, saying nothing. Wishing she could take it back. After a few minutes she too stood, putting her notebook and pencil away. She carried the plate of cookies to the kitchen she spotted. As she looked for something to cover them with, Jaskier turned the corner and gasped softly.

  
"Cookies? Aww, you shouldn't have." He grabbed one and started to much on it. Becca gave a wry smile.

  
"I'm afraid you might be the only one that appreciates the gesture." She looked to him.

  
"Why, what's wrong?" Jaskier asked, sensing her sadness. "Did Eskel say something? I'm sure he didn't mean it, he's just gruff and-"

  
"No. No I fucked up." Becca said. "I asked a stupid question, and it was obviously a sensitive subject, and he just closed off." She sighed sadly, looking away. "I didn't mean to, really. I didn't want to do anything to upset him but, I think I really pissed him off."

  
"Well... I'm sure he'll come around." Jaskier tried to help. "He can't hate you too much, I mean you're here. In record time too! You're a whole year ahead of where I was." Sensing that his pep talk wasn't improving anything Jaskier tried just speaking truthfully. "Becca, it will be fine. Nothing happens in a day. And he has to know you didn't mean to."

  
Becca nodded. Though she was still saddened, Jaskier's words had made a difference. Seeing her mood improve Jaskier reached for the cookies again. 

  
"I'm going to take some of these to Geralt." He said, trying to sound positive. "I won't tell him they're from you, but he'll know."

  
"You think that he'll like them?"

  
"One way to find out."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> She done fucked up.
> 
> There's no way around it. I'm sorry. Had to be done.
> 
> If you are sad for Eskel tell me about it. I wrote the damn thing and I feel horrible.
> 
> I'd like to say that I could never. I'd like to.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I know you're a brutish lot, but honestly the two of you could be nicer to her. The poor girl is grasping at straws trying to impress you and make it up to Eskel."
> 
> "Hmm." Geralt grunted.
> 
> "You could talk to him, try and smooth the whole thing over." Jaskier recommended.
> 
> "That's his business." Geralt shook his head. "He can be pissed if he wants."
> 
> OR  
> Witchers are terrible at communication and forgiveness, and when it comes to some very human aspects of apologies and forgiveness, it is probably for the best that Jaskier is there.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I couldn't leave it for forever.  
> It's just not fair, and maybe you've heard the old saying "don't go to bed in spurs"
> 
> Well its not exactly like that, but I really don't wanna let this story focus on being angry for forever.  
> So we're fixing it now.

"It's been weeks." Geralt grumbled.

  
"Well, she's still sorry." Jaskier responded. The two of them looked out over the sea of baked goods that had accumulated from Becca's visits. Everything from brownies to cakes to lemon bars. Each one saying 'Im sorry for saying stupid things.' And 'Thank you for letting me come back.' "At least you know she's trying."

  
"We have our own food." 

  
"Oh Geralt, it's not about that and you know it." Jaskier looked at his beloved patiently. "I know you're a brutish lot, but honestly the two of you could be nicer to her. The poor girl is grasping at straws trying to impress you and make it up to Eskel."

  
"Hmm." Geralt grunted.

  
"You could talk to him, try and smooth the whole thing over." Jaskier recommended.

  
"That's his business." Geralt shook his head. "He can be pissed if he wants."

  
"The longer this goes on, my dear, the more food will end up in this kitchen." Jaskier gestured to the already absorbed counter space. "The other solution to your problem could be if you would actually try to eat any of the things that she brings. Acting pissy and avoiding them on principle is doing you absolutely no good, and it's severely hurting her feelings!"

  
"Jaskier, no one asked her to bring any of this." Geralt turned toward him. "She should just stop, because it's obvious that this tactic isn't working, it's just annoying."

  
"How can you love me so much and still not understand the inner workings of human emotion?" Jaskier reached out to cup Geralts face in his hands. "You're so smart when it comes to so many other things. But, fortunately for us all I am here and I will simplify these gestures for you." Jaskier stroked along Geralt's cheeks for a moment, gentling him before delivering a hard truth. "She is trying to find something you like, but she thinks you hate her. When a person brings a gift like this, it is because they are trying to get you to like them. When that hospitality is not returned, even in subtle ways like not being genuine in your reception, it sends a message that she needs to do better. All you are doing by refusing her gifts is inviting more misguided peace offerings." 

  
"Sounds exhausting." Geralt frowned severely but held onto Jaskier's hands, pressing them closer into his skin.

  
"It is exhausting. You are unbelievably cantankerous and difficult to please." Jaskier pressed a kiss to the corner of Geralt's frown. "Just tell her that you appreciate the effort, even the effort to apologize, but that it is not necessary. And do it as gently as your are able, try not to do any more damage than you have already."

  
"Hm."

  
"And for the love of God, talk to your brother." Jaskier insisted. "You and I both know she didn't mean to, and at this point he's just pouting for show."

  
"I'll do what I can," Geralt kissed Jaskier again. "But it's still not my business."

  
~~~

  
"So, your efforts are... Appreciated. But not necessary." Geralt repeated the words Jaskier had told him to use.

  
"Oh." Becca seemed caught off guard. She was holding another plate in her hands, this one laden with cinnamon buns. "I'm sorry, I... If I'd know I wouldn't have-"

  
"It's fine." Geralt cut her off. "Just... No more." He glanced over to the side where Jaskier was peeping around the corner. "Please."

  
"Okay." Becca nodded. "Well, would you like one since they're here anyway?"

  
Geralt glanced toward Jaskier again who nodded vigerously. "Sure." Geralt took a cinnamon bun from the top of the pile and dutifully began to eat it. It was very sweet and he didn't really care for it, but true to his training managed to maintain a neutral if somewhat harsh looking expression. "Thanks." Was all he replied.

  
The two of them sat and started to talk. More accurately, Becca began to ask questions and Geralt found the fewest amount of words possible to respond. Sometimes he didn't respond at all. 

  
"What do you wear when you have to fight monsters?"

  
"Uh..." Geralt looked down at his monochrome outfit. It was just a black T-shirt and jeans, but it felt like a uniform of sorts.

  
"To protect yourself, I mean." Becca clarified.

  
"Leather mostly." Geralt responded. "Like a jacket."

  
"Leather... Jacket." Becca scribbled in her notes. "And that protects you?"

  
"As much as it can." Geralt replied, watching her. "You still get the shit beaten out of you sometimes, but it's not so bad. Doesn't usually take long to heal."

  
"Right, like you heal superhumanly quick." She laughed, but the serious look on Geralts face clued her in to the fact that it was not actually a joke. "Oh. Really?"

  
"It's... part of being a Witcher." Was all he said.

  
"I see..." Becca smiled, tense. "Are there other cool enhanced things you can do or are just going to save those for until they become relevant?" The ensuing quiet told her everything she needed to know. "Right."  
The sudden vibration in her pocket drew her attention away from Geralt. She pulled out her phone and her brow furrowed at the screen.

"You can take it." Geralt told her.

  
"Oh, but we're in the middle of-"

  
"It's fine, I have some stuff I need to do in the meantime." Geralt gave her a look that was not quite a smile, but softer than his resting face. "Answer the message."

  
"Okay." She agreed. "It's just an underclassman friend from college, asking about History methods stuff. Shouldn't take long." With a huff Geralt got up to leave her too it and slipped into the other room where Jaskier had been eavesdropping the whole time.

  
"Geralt!" He actually had the gall to act surprised. "Fancy seeing you, I thought you were busy with-"

  
"Save it." Geralt pressed a kiss to his lips, effectively shutting him up. "I could hear you in here, eavesdropping poorly, the whole time."

  
"Damn Witcher senses." Jaskier mumbled between kisses and embraces. "But it's going well. You're being very kind to her, thank you."

  
"Hmm." Geralt looked at Jaskier. "I'll have to go back in there."

  
"Ah, well." Jaskier shrugged and tilted his head. "With enough luck you may not have to."

  
"What did you do?" Geralt eyed him suspiciously. 

  
"What you wouldn't." Jaskier tapped Geralt on the nose. "Got involved in his business."

  
"Jaskier-!"

  
But before the two could argue there was a set of footsteps approaching the room where their guest sat. The next moment a slight gasp.

  
"Oh, Eskel." Becca chuckled nervously. She was startled, but not scared. There was a difference, not as sharp. "Listen, about-"

  
"It's fine." He insisted. "I know you didn't mean it. It's just a... Sensitive topic. Don't wanna talk about it."

  
"Okay. Well I really am sorry." She said it with such genuine earnest that it really illustrated what a child he was being for avoiding her so long.

  
"Yeah, the fucking bakery in the kitchen said that already." He happened to glance down to see the cinnamon buns on the table.

  
"I had already brought them." She tried weakly to explain.

  
"Anyway, I just wanted to tell you that... We're fine." He stated it plainly. The budding smile on Becca's face made him turn away just slightly before she tried to blind him. "I'll do your interrogations, or whatever, again."

  
"I'd like that." She stated plainly.

  
"Just as a thought, if you gave us the questions ahead of time it'd... Be easier to think of answers. And avoid any bad ones."

  
"That's... A really good idea actually." Her expression softened. "Thanks." After a moment, Becca suddenly spoke up again. "Do you want one? A cinnamon bun, I mean?"

  
"Nah." Eskel waved a hand. "Not a fan of sweets. Just, please stop bringing them."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't even try to tell me that flooding someone's kitchen with baked goods is not an apology tactic.
> 
> It may not be a GOOD one, but it is a tactic.
> 
> And TBH thank goodness for Jaskier being the only smart one for once. It's asking a lot.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "By the way," Jaskier began, not bothering to hide his devilish little smile. "You know what time of year it is, right?"  
> "... Autumn?" 
> 
> OR  
> It is finally time to begin THAT conversation. The weather is getting colder and Jaskier just simply needs to know.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We have successfully made it through the exposition! Which if you ask me is the hardest part.
> 
> Now, It's time to address that burning question, and I know what you may be thinking, but hopefully the story isn't quite that predictable.
> 
> But this is a very chill chapter. Important in the context of the story, but narratively there's not a ton happening.

It had been a little bit of time. The weeks rolled into a month, and then another, and soon the weather started to get cold. It was about a week into October, and despite the drop in temperatures it was a gorgeous Autumn day outside. Jaskier was looking out the window to admire it as he waited for his companion, daydreaming and thinking of chords in his head. There was a song out there somewhere, between the rustling leaves and sweaters, he could feel it in his bones.

  
The bell over the door tinkled as it swung open and Jaskier glanced over. His face split into a smile as his friend rushed over.

  
"How was work?" He asked, Becca pulled off her scarf and jacket as she slid into the chair across from him. She was still wearing her polo shirt and fixed him with a look that said it all. "Yeah, well, that good huh? Here, your hot chocolate."

  
"Ahh, you are a rose among thorns." Becca smiled and took the paper cup from him. She went to take a sip, but it was still too hot so she just took the lid off and stirred at it. "How was your day?"

  
"Same as ever, nothing exceptional." Jaskier leaned to rest his chin in the palm of one hand, propping his head up. "Any progress on the research?"

  
"Ugh, no." Becca rolled her eyes. "I've hit a wall. I'm spinning my wheels and I don't know what to do." She huffed. "But that's research for ya."

  
"Hm. Any progress with that book Eskel gave you?"

  
"Very slow. It is SO dry, I mean I get the necessity of being straightforward, but they couldn't jazz it up a little?" She tried a little sip of her hot chocolate again. "I'll say this, it is very effective at putting me to sleep at night."

  
The two of them chuckled and lapsed into easy silence for a while. It was nice for Jaskier to have a friend he could talk to about all of the Witcher business without blowing the lid off of everything. Sure, he had written some pretty thinly veiled songs about it, but now he had someone who could share real time in the highs and lows of bearing this information. The two became fast friends, and even though their interests mostly diverged they still found plenty to talk about, or often tease each other about. Which reminded him.

  
"By the way," Jaskier began, not bothering to hide his devilish little smile. "You know what time of year it is, right?"

  
"... Autumn?" 

  
"Noooo, it's cuffing season." Jaskier was awfully proud of himself for bringing this up.

  
"Oh." Becca rolled her eyes. "Sure."

  
"Don't roll your eyes!" Jaskier reached across the table to swat at her. She tried, and failed, to subdue a smile. "This is serious. Now tell me, who's in the running?"

  
"No one." Becca shrugged, smiling fondly at him.

  
"C'mon, don't lie to me. I thought we were friends? You'll hurt my feelings."

  
"Seriously, Jaskier. There really is no one to pursue." Becca insisted. "I barely have friends out here, save yourself and Geralt and Eskel, although those last two may be a bit generous."

  
"Of course they're your friends. Acquaintances at least."

  
"At any rate, I'm not in a position to be looking for romance. Besides, I'm not super interested anyway." She paused, taking a sip of her cocoa. "I don't fall a little bit in love with everyone like you do."

  
"Oh no?"

  
"I..." Becca stopped to think. Deep down, she was a bit of a romantic, but it just wasn't practical to run around like that looking for trouble. Sighing, she continued. "I've had my fair share of little fantasies, sure. And it would be nice to believe that I could live in a world like that! I'm not discriminatory about who I find attractive, and I'm sure I could fall in love with anyone; man, woman, or somewhere in between. But at the end of the day, I just..." She looked at Jaskier earnestly and smiled sadly. "Can't."

  
Jaskier returned her sad smile.

  
"Besides, I'm too ambitious for love right now." She laughed, trying to lighten the mood. "I can't have a potential love interest playing second string to my academic pursuits to blow the top off of all this Witcher research." 

  
"Sure." Jaskier smiled into his coffee. "But I don't think you and I are as different as you make us sound."

  
"I have survived many a cuffing season alone before, and I will continue to survive." Becca stated matter of factly. "As much as everyone insists the season is awful, I happen to like winter."

  
"To Winter." Jaskier raised his coffee cup, touching it to Becca's before taking another sip. "Although you may not have a significant other on your arm, I promise you, you will not spend this season alone."

  
"Awww, you sap."

  
"What can I say?"

  
"You're a bleedin' heart."

  
"Ooh, that might almost be a good lyric." Jaskier mused. The two sat and laughed, teasing each other until they reached the dregs of their beverages and bundled up against the Autumn chill once more.  
Becca thought to herself as they walked the streets together, pleased with the realization Jaskier had given her.

  
Although it was a far stretch from the life she had lived before, both at college and all the way back to high school, she had survived just like every time. Despite all her fears, Jaskier was right.

  
She wasn't alone anymore. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For anyone that may be unsure, "Cuffing Season" is the time of year when the weather begins to get colder and people begin pairing up to spend the winter months a bit warmer. 
> 
> Jaskier is nothing if not a bit nosey, but he does mean well.  
> After all, the last thing anyone wants is to be playing the superfluous fourth wheel of the tricycle, that ought to be more of a bicycle, but some things can't be helped.
> 
> And I swear that this conversation comes back around, there's a lot of fun development to play with.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I'm making myself soup." Becca smiled. "None of that canned stuff, I'm talking real home made Chicken Noodle soup."
> 
> Jaskier whined. "You'll bring me some, right?"
> 
> "I guess I can make extra, but isn't it dangerous to bring it? I don't want to risk the other two catching this cold too."
> 
> "Ah, fuck them." Jaskier spat. "It's not like it matters anyway, and I want soup!"
> 
> OR  
> The two mortals catch a cold and there is soup. That's it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really love Chicken noodle soup, so I did totally write this chapter because of that, yes.   
> But also because friendship? Is that convincing?
> 
> Contrary to earlier chapter notes, I 100% endorse following this example. DO make soup for your friends! it's a very nice and safe thing to do.

“I’m sick.” The statement was punctuated with a cough and a sniffle.

  
“Ohhhhhhh, Jaskier I’m sorry.” Becca pushes through her own raw throat. “I told you to stay away from me.”

  
“Yeah Yeah, dealing with kids and the public and all that." Jaskier set his laptop on the arm of the couch, looking pitifully at Becca on the other side. "I feel awful."

  
"I'm making myself soup." Becca smiled. "None of that canned stuff, I'm talking real home made Chicken Noodle soup."

  
Jaskier whined. "You'll bring me some, right?"

  
"I guess I can make extra, but isn't it dangerous to bring it? I don't want to risk the other two catching this cold too."

  
"Ah, fuck them." Jaskier spat. "It's not like it matters anyway, and I want soup!"

  
"Okay okay," Becca chuckled, raspy from the congestion in her chest. "I'll swing by this afternoon to drop off soup."

  
"You're a peach." Jaskier smiled.

  
"Anything for you." The sentiment would have been sweeter if not for the blowing of her nose afterwards.

  
~~~

  
Shuffling up the stairs was way harder with wind blowing the hair into her eyes and her hands full of a large pot of soup. Fortunately for Becca, the door opened without her saying or signaling anything, and large, warm hands took the large pot from her. Finally able to push the hair out of her face, Becca smiled.

  
"Your hands are freezing." Geralt commented.

  
"Yeah, I lost my gloves." Becca shrugged. She quickly slipped through the door as Geralt held it open with his foot. "The soup will need to warm up on the stove, but I brought enough for everyone since... If you don't need it now, you might need it later.

  
"...Thanks." Geralt had no idea what she was talking about, but he wasn't about to complain about free soup. For once, Becca had actually brought something that they were appreciative of.

  
"Becccaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa," Jaskier cried from the sitting room. "I'm dying!"

  
"He's been bitching all day." Geralt mumbled. "I'll put this on the stove. Eskel is reading somewhere."

  
"I'm sure he'll come out eventually." Becca hung up her coat and bag, trying to keep it away from the other three's coats to try to minimize the spread of infection. She pulled a box from her bag and walked toward the sitting room. 

  
Jaskier was draped across the couch, a circle of tissues surrounding him and clearly playing up his illness.

  
"Okay, Jas, it's a cold, not a fainting disease." Smiling fondly, she set the tissue box down on the table anyway. "What? You expect Geralt to pick up your snotty tissues?"

  
"It would be a testament to love." Jaskier replied blandly. The two laughed briefly, narrowly avoiding coughing fits.

  
"You're taking medicine, right?" The way Jaskier looked at her should have been answer enough, but still Becca waited for a response.

  
"There is a right answer here..." Jaskier began carefully, "but I can't give it to you."

  
"Why am I not surprised?" Becca huffed. "I may have gotten you sick, but you will get the other two sick."

  
"Oh fuck them, I won't get them sick." Jaskier flopped sulkily on the couch, pulling the blanket around his shoulders. "They can't get sick. Stupid Witcher mutations or whatever."

  
"Seriously?" Becca asked. "Jesus, that is so unfair. And I brought soup for them!"

  
"You did?" Jaskier looked at her softly. "Aww, that was really nice. I hope they appreciate it."

  
"Well, Geralt didn't look too moody when he took it from me." Becca chuckled, then coughed. "Ahem, in any case, I figured it was the least I could do for bringing illness into their lives."

  
"Bold of you to assume soup will make us forgive you." Eskel stood in the doorway. "Had to deal with Jaskier's moaning and whining all day, that's worth at least 20 soups."

  
"Hey!" Jaskier cried.

  
"It could be worse. It could be you that's sick." Becca replied. "Do you wanna sit?" She made to get up so Eskel would take her seat.

  
"Sit down, I'm not so helpless you need to feed me _and_ give up your seat." Eskel waved her off. 

  
"Could have fooled me," Becca smirked. "Old people are supposed to be extra susceptible to illness, bad joints, and bitching."

  
"Oh I'm bitching?"

  
"Yeah, you're bitching!"

  
"Eskel's bitching again?" Geralt approached, the faintest of smiles on his face.

  
"Hey, these two snotty sons-of-bitches are the ones who are bitching." Eskel replied.

  
"Ooohhhhhhhh, shut up!" Jaskier shouted. "Bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch. Hey! Is the soup ready yet? Maybe eating will put your mouth to better use."

  
There was a few chuckles in response. Geralt spoke up. "It's almost ready." 

  
"And what do you say to her for very kindly making extra soup?" Jaskier prompted.

  
"Thanks."

  
"Yeah thanks." 

  
"It's not that big of a deal. I had leftover chicken carcass anyway, and when I heard Jaskier ask for soup I just threw some extra vegetables, stock, or whatever else in." Becca shrugged, smiling. "It was nice to cook for more than myself."

  
"Less talking, more soup." Jaskier, miraculously, had found a way to look more pathetic as he draped himself across the couch.

  
"Alright, you little baby." Geralt grumbled affectionately.

  
"Yeah, Jas..." Becca smiled wickedly. "Stop bitching."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What is some budding friendship without a little bit of banter?  
> I mean honestly.
> 
> As always, I would love to hear from y'all about what you liked or found amusing, or maybe just how much you also love soup.
> 
> Try not to get your friends sick, and stay wonderful. <3


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You're still coming tonight, right?"
> 
> "Of course! It will really help me to see some of the methods and techniques I've been reading about." Becca responded. "It was nice of Geralt to say I could come."
> 
> "Yeah..." Jaskier nodded a little too confidently. "So nice."
> 
> OR  
> Jaskier totally lies in an attempt to get permission to go on the night's hunt, and it does not go well. 
> 
> They should have stayed home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
> 
> Ok I KNOW I just posted the last chapter, but I have had this one sitting around for FOREVER at this point and tbh I really really liked it, and I got more done than I expected so I'm ahead anyway so... It's not that big of a deal.
> 
> I'm putting this chapter up.
> 
> Fair warning, there is quite a bit of danger this chapter.
> 
> But... it wouldn't be monster hunting without monsters.

“Why are you eating Ice cream in January?"

  
"Because it's delicious, next question." Becca looked through the phone screen with a smile for Jaskier. "Why let the weather determine what you can or can't eat?"

  
"I suppose so." Jaskier responded. "You're still coming tonight, right?"

  
"Of course! It will really help me to see some of the methods and techniques I've been reading about." Becca responded. "It was nice of Geralt to say I could come."

  
"Yeah..." Jaskier nodded a little too confidently. "So nice."

  
~~~

  
"No."

  
"But Geralt!"

  
"Jaskier I said no." Geralt crossed his arms and looked down at Jaskier, even if it was hard because they were almost the same height.

  
"Why not?" Jaskier whined. "I need new song inspiration and Becca needs to see you in action."

  
"No."

  
Meanwhile, Becca stood off to the side, arms crossed with a severe frown. Eskel stood next to her, sighing at the lover's quarrel happening in front of their building. This had been going on for at least ten minutes and they still had yet to leave. 

  
"He lied to me." Becca mumbled. "I should have seen it coming, but still!"

  
"It's not safe to let you go."

  
"But you said it yourself! You're not even going to kill any monsters, just checking on a nonviolent group!"

  
Eskel just shrugged, not willing to argue. Sure, that was the first stop they were making, but the next nearby stop was more dangerous and it wasn't worth discussing all of those details just to deny the two humans admittance to the monster hunting party. 

  
"Fuck! Fine!" Geralt finally broke. "You can come, but you have to stay outside."

  
"How are we supposed to see anything from outside?" Jaskier demanded.

  
"You don't." Geralt narrowed his eyes. "But this way, I also won't be able to hear you complaining."

  
"Oh, we are so going to talk about this later."

  
"By 'talk about it' he means they will loudly have sex and disrupt me." Eskel mumbled in the general vicinity of Becca. After thinking about it, her face twisted into a rather grossed out expression. Jaskier was basically her age, a mere 2-3 years older, and absolutely permitted to be sexual with his boyfriend, but that didn't mean she wanted to think about it. Suddenly, she had a lot of sympathy for Eskel who couldn't escape the couple. She reached out to place a sympathetic hand on his arm, as if to say "that's rough buddy," but Eskel shook her touch off as soon as she made contact. Becca did not try to touch him again.

  
"Let's get this over with." Geralt began to walk off. Eskel followed without a word, but Jaskier was evidently not done with their tiff from earlier. He angrily followed and continued to shout out at Geralt for being moody, or rude, or any number of other soft insults. Becca just walked close to Jaskier, rolling her eyes.

  
"You told me this was going to be okay." 

  
"I thought it would be."

  
"You didn't ask ahead of time!" Becca savagely whispered. "Now we're dead weight, Jaskier, what were you thinking?"

  
"I thought it would work out, and it did." Jaskier actually had the balls to smile at her, pleased with the situation.

  
"In what world?"

  
"This one. We're going! And we will get what we came for."

  
"God... Why am I friends with you?"

  
"Because you love me, and I was right." Jaskier threw an arm around her. "We are going with them, lighten up. It'll be fine."

  
The blocks they walked felt long and tiresome, and Becca could feel the exhaustion in her bones before they had even reached their destination. Why didn't they just drive? She was afraid to ask, already imposing and being an inconvenience because Jaskier had lied to her. It probably had something to do with discipline and being a Witcher, or maybe it was just retribution for Becca and Jaskier insisting to come. Whatever the reason, by the time they finally reached the old building Becca was desperate for somewhere to sit down. 

  
"Here." Geralt tossed her something, and it was a miracle Becca caught it. When she turned it over in her hands she almost looked confused. It looked like a little Bluetooth earpiece.

  
"What is it?"

  
"Communication." Geralt responded. "You're staying out here, but we'll still need to be able to talk to you."

  
"Only one?" Jaskier asked.

  
"You're staying together." Geralt looked right at him. "You should only need one."

  
"Why should she get it?" Jaskier asked without malice.

  
"She's been the less annoying one." Geralt responded with a half smirk.

  
“I am the responsible one.” Becca mumbled. Then looking at Jaskier, “no offense.”

  
“It’s fine.” Jaskier sighed. "I know."

  
The two Witchers dutifully entered the building as Jaskier and Becca sat outside. About thirty seconds after they disappeared from view, Becca heard Geralt in her ear.

  
“Can you hear me?”

  
“Loud and clear.” Eskel responded.

  
“Yeah.” Becca responded.

  
“Becca?”

  
“I said yeah.”

  
“You have to push the button on the side.”

  
“Oh.” She pressed it. “Yeah I can hear you.”

  
“Good. You’ll be able to hear any commentary made, but most importantly, if one of us says to run you run.”

  
“Run where?”

  
“Away.”

  
Well that was succinct. Becca listened closely, writing notes as Geralt and Eskel commented on mundane aspects of their mission. Occasionally she filled Jaskier in on the more interesting parts, which were still in Jaskier’s words, “a snooze fest.” Becca was happy to not be in any danger, but she had to agree that all of this was rather boring. A sudden crash in the middle of Eskel’s commentary had her gasping.

  
“What was that?” She asked quickly.

  
“I don’t know, but it was close.” Eskel replied.

  
“There shouldn’t be anything but the couple of Hirikka we came looking for.” Geralt explained.

  
“That’s weird.” Becca mumbled. This seemed to interest Jaskier, who had been leaning on a wall.

  
“What’s going on?” He asked. “Tell me, what’s going on?”

  
“I-it’s nothing. Just a little confusion.” Becca forced a smile, trying to look casual.

  
“Fuck staying out here. All the action is inside!” Jaskier took off in a sprint toward the building. Panicking, Becca ran after him.

  
“Wait! Jaskier! Hold up! You can’t go in there!” She chased him, but he was faster. By the time she reached the building, he had disappeared. “Fuck.”

  
“Do you remember how I told you to run if I said to?” Geralt’s voice came over the earpiece again.

  
“Uhhhhhhhhhhh” Becca was frantically trying to search for Jaskier. Geralt must have picked up on the nerves in her voice because he became even more firm.

  
“Do you?”

  
“That’s gonna be, uh, kind of hard.”

  
“Fuck! Don’t tell me you’re in the building.” Eskel growled.

  
“I didn’t want to!” Becca cried. “But Jaskier ran in and now I’ve lost him!”

  
“You have GOT to be shitting me.”

  
“Guys I’m sorry.” Becca could feel the tears threatening to spill over.

  
“Where are you?” Geralt asked.

  
“I don’t know how deep I am. There’s walls, and broken glass, and some broken pipes, and-“ the resounding crash from behind her scared her to the point of screaming. She began to run away from the sound, crying as she did, “And really really loud noises!” 

  
“Don’t scream! You’ll draw it to you.” Eskel warned her.She made a quick turn into a somewhat secluded area.

Her heart was hammering in her chest, ears ringing and throat and chest tight from gasping for breath. The feeling of running from certain doom was an unwelcome feeling, and as much as she felt safer than before, Becca was aware that she and the other three members of her party were far from safety. She tried to organize her thoughts, to find some landmark or critical feature that would either help her escape or give one of her friends some idea of where she was. Willing her legs to move from under her, Becca hugged the wall and slipped down another hallway. After two more she was ready to give up and collapse crying, but she could hear a shout from a distance. Her heart clenched at the sound, it sounded fearful. She ran toward it, searching desperately.

  
Jaskier was in a bit of a bad place. He had run in looking for adventure and the next bit of action, but very quickly he got lost. He tried shouting, hoping one of the Witcher’s would hear him and find him, then he could finally see what was happening. Instead, he had attracted a lot of unwanted attention in the form of some terribly mutated or cursed hounds. There had been more than one, he knew that much, but was able to run away quick enough that the number eased down to one chasing him. He ran as fast as he could and darted around things, behind things, over something once, but he could not shake the damned dog. Finally, backed into a corner, Jaskier made a last ditch attempt to get someone, anyone’s attention.

He shouted, hoping desperately that someone had heard him. But the creature was closing in fast, and Jaskier looked into it’s eyes as it threatened to attack. He was behind a small pile of junk, but he wasn’t naive enough to believe it would protect him. He watched pitifully as the creature... lurched to the side. Suddenly a long metal bar hit it in the head, stunning it and causing it to tumble over for a moment. On the other end of the metal bar was Becca, tears streaming down her face as she frantically hit the creature away.

  
“Run!” She screamed. Jaskier started running, grabbing her hand as he passed. Like hell he was going to abandon her again. Not when there was a real chance of them getting hurt. As the two of them ran from the room, Geralt ran from the other direction. The Witcher stayed to deal with the monster as Jaskier and Becca sprinted. They ran, but without knowing how to get out they weren't in much better shape than before.

  
"This way!" Eskel was at the end of the hallway, guiding them out. All three of them ran for the exit and put distance between them and the building. Finally far enough away, they stopped, beginning to collect their breath. 

  
"Geralt!" Jaskier cried.

  
"He's coming." Eskel assured him. Sure enough, the next moment Geralt was rushing from the building and up to the crowd. Jaskier immediately threw his arms around the Witcher.

  
Becca, exhaustion seeping into her every cell, leaned against Eskel who blessedly didn't push her away. The smell of fear and adrenaline was slowly abating from her, being replaced with relief now that the witcher's body was between her and that building.

  
After they had caught their breath and felt more safe in the knowledge of their narrow escape, the anger kicked in.

  
"What were you thinking?" Geralt and Becca shouted at Jaskier in tandem. It was Becca, however, who went the extra mile.

  
"You asshole!" She lashed out and hit him square in the chest. "You could have gotten us killed! You knew I would have to follow you! Jesus, what the hell is wrong with you?"

  
"But we're not dead!" Jaskier exclaimed. "Thanks to you, you were amazing! How were you able to knock it over like that?"

  
"I don't know, okay? I almost died! Again!" Becca was experiencing such a wide range of emotions. "Fuck, is that adrenaline still or exhilaration? I don't even know." She began to laugh. "This is really my life now."

"I think you might still be coming down." Eskel said. "Let's get outta here."

  
"We're done already?" Jaskier asked.

  
"No, WE are not done." Geralt responded. "But you two are going back before Eskel and I continue."

  
"Yeah, well, I guess that's fair." Jaskier mumbled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))  
> No one got hurt.
> 
> Thankfully.
> 
> I will admit that this is not my FAVORITE action scene I've ever written, but I'm doing this whole thing for fun anyway so it's really not that big of a deal.  
> Besides, I think I will certainly make up for it in the future.
> 
> I guess that's why I tagged for near-death experiences, right? lol
> 
> I'd love to hear from y'all about your thoughts. reading and responding to comments makes me so happy, even if this fic is really just kinda my quarantine hobby right now.  
> Also, any speculation on where things are heading? Thoughts on what event we'll see next?  
> I don't exactly want to beg for commentary, but... I do really love it. So consider this my begging lol.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “What are you up to?”
> 
> “It is lunch time, and we have been working in the library all morning.” Becca stepped toward the hallway. She looked back to Eskel with a little chuckle. “Not everything has to have an ulterior motive.” 
> 
> OR  
> A soft chapter, because everyone deserves it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After the craziness and life threatening level of the last chapter, I felt like it was only fair to allow there to be some softness.
> 
> It's a pretty innocent chapter, a lot of more introspective stuff.
> 
> It's soft. <3

“Here.” Becca placed a plate and a glass on the table in front of Eskel. “Been working too hard.”

  
“What is this?” Eskel eyed her suspiciously. 

  
“A sandwich.” Becca replied simply.

  
“No, I mean what is this buttering me up bullshit?” Eskel looked critically. “What are you up to?”

  
“It is lunch time, and we have been working in the library all morning.” Becca stepped toward the hallway. She looked back to Eskel with a little chuckle. “Not everything has to have an ulterior motive.” She left the room on a mission to grab her own sandwich. Eskel sighed, relaxing back into his chair at the table. She was right, they had been working for a long time and, now that he thought about it, he was feeling a bit hungry. Looking at the sandwich, Eskel felt something unexpected bubbling deep inside. He wouldn’t say anything, and it was nothing worth saying, but it was just that side of too hard to ignore. When Becca came back into the room with her own sandwich Eskel felt that little flare again. 

  
“Come on,” Becca pressed the plate closer. “It’s just a sandwich, don’t look so pained.”

  
Eskel felt the slightest little pull on the corner of his mouth. It wasn’t a smile, not even close, but it was involuntary. Without saying a word he pulled the sandwich off the plate. She had even cut it in half. "Diagonal cut?" He questioned.

  
Becca took a moment to swallow her bite. "Triangle sandwiches are just more special," she looked at Eskel, and smiled warmly. "Ya know?"

  
"Hm," Eskel turned back to the book he was looking at. He absently ate the sandwich as the two of them sat and continued to work in silence. Once or twice he glanced over at Becca, who was eating her sandwich and reading a book of her own. She flipped some of her hair off her shoulder and leaned on the knuckles of her hand. Eskel huffed quietly and turned away. The bubbling feeling returned, and Eskel tried to pin it down. It was the faintest feeling, but not unpleasant. If he really thought about it, he had felt something like this once before. 

  
At that realization, Eskel huffed a small sigh. He buried it into the sandwich, and Becca barely twitched in response. It would be easier if she remained totally unaware. Because Eskel realized, as they sat in the quiet library, reading through books, with the noon sun filtering through the window, that the bubbling sensation he was experiencing was fondness.

  
~~~

  
It should have been annoying. The tug of fondness that curled in his gut. Eskel had left to grab something, a simple task, but admittedly had gotten caught up and distracted with something else. It shouldn't have been a big deal.

  
Yet, when he finally did return, any comment he may have thought to make died in his throat. Eskel didn't think he had been gone for _that_ long, but he supposed he wasn't really sure. And anyway, it had been a lifetime ago that he had felt any sort of human needs or desires, so maybe it really wasn't that surprising.

  
Becca was asleep. She had curled herself up on the armchair in the corner, book teetering on her lap, clearly with the intent of continuing to read it before sleep unexpectedly claimed her. Eskel approached, footsteps light, to look closer. As he stood above her he let go of a soft breath of laughter. 

  
It would be so easy to take the simple road and describe her as peaceful, or radiant, or any number of poetic terms. But truthfully, as Eskel looked at her sleeping face he couldn't help thinking she looked somewhat funny. Her cheek was firmly pressed into the leather backing of the chair, and her mouth hung partially open. Her eyes were closed and she looked well and truly dead to the world. Eskel was struck by how genuinely she looked like she was caught off guard by falling asleep. One minute perfectly awake, the next, body limp and snoring.

  
But, underneath it all, she did look peaceful. There was something in the vulnerability of falling asleep in the metaphorical wolf's den that stoked the fires of Eskel's newfound fondness for her. Since the beginning, Eskel recalled that she had never been afraid _OF_ the Witchers. She had been afraid in the presence of them often enough that Eskel was perfectly aware of what it would both look and smell like. However, despite his acquaintance with her fear, it was blessedly never directed at him.

  
He could be thankful for small miracles.

  
It was unusual for anyone to be cordial to the Witchers. Most steered clear, glancing at them out of the corners of their eyes and mumbling under their breaths. Caught face to face, most people shifted uncomfortably at the best of times and straight up fled other times. 

  
And Eskel was painfully aware that he was more monstrous than his brother. Knew intimately the way that humans looked, and shuddered, and recoiled from his scarred face. It was easier to stay in the comfort of the library, inside of their home, so to speak. If he did go out, it was better to stay obscured in the darkness.

  
But Becca, despite her prodding questions early on, had never seemed very pressed or bothered by his scars. She had seen him at all times of day, in various lighting, and yet she looked at Eskel the same way that she looked at Geralt, or even Jaskier.

  
Eskel was thankful for that. He couldn't express it in words, but it meant a lot. The last person who had accepted him for his scars had begun dating his brother. 

  
As she slept there, Eskel did her the small mercy of deciding not to wake her up. He gently took the book from her, careful to mark the page before setting it on the table. He thought of something else he could do and hoped that he could be quick and sneaky enough to get away with it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's important to have development.  
> Here we can see the surly Witcher having rare soft feelings. 
> 
> I love writing soft things. <3
> 
> And Eskel deserves some soft things.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Hey," Becca chuckled. "I guess I dozed off, sorry."
> 
> "It happens, the books aren't exactly page-turners." Eskel almost laughed.
> 
> "Still..." Becca shrugged. "Guess it's lucky this blanket magically appeared."
> 
> OR  
> The soft energy continues, but they need to have a serious conversation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A double upload??  
> I know, I know... but I did write them together and I'm a little farther ahead anyway, and if you ask me, these chapters really need to be put together anyway.
> 
> They need to talk about the elephant in the room. And Eskel deserves EVEN MORE softness.

Becca woke up feeling disoriented. She peeled her cheek from the leather of the chair and groaned. Falling asleep in a chair was not very advisable, but she hadn't exactly intended to fall asleep. As she moved she noticed the gentlest weight over her body.

It was a blanket. It was very soft; softer than anything she had seen in the building, and she was pleasantly surprised. A quick glance toward the window told her that it was after sunset, and she was alone in the room.

  
She stood, stretching her bones and softly huffing in pleasure as they popped and cracked sufficiently. After a moment of consideration she wrapped the blanket around herself, thankful for the extra warmth. She shuffled through the hallways, looking for anyone else. Finding Eskel in the kitchen, she leaned against the doorway. She didn't even have to say anything, it was like he was aware she there inherently.

  
"Hey," he glanced at her for just a moment, turning back to the leftovers he was reheating.

  
"Hey," Becca chuckled. "I guess I dozed off, sorry."

  
"It happens, the books aren't exactly page-turners." Eskel almost laughed.

  
"Still..." Becca shrugged. "Guess it's lucky this blanket magically appeared." She shook the ends of for emphasis.

  
"Mhm." Eskel didn't bother looking at her.

  
"Uh huh, right." Becca smiled. "Thanks."

  
"Yeah, well..." Eskel rubbed absentmindedly at his face. "It gets cold in the library."

  
"And that's the only reason?"

  
"Well," Eskel mumbled, fingers tracing over his scars. "Seemed like you needed one."

  
"Has nothing to do with you, you know, being nice or anything?" Becca felt the smile threatening to crack on her face. She did her best to conceal it.

  
"I..." Eskel looked down at his leftovers, pointedly avoiding eye contact. He scratched at his right side, trying to relieve the dull itch of his scars. "Didn't look for a soft blanket because you'd like it. Just found it.”

  
"Uh huh." Becca was openly smiling now. "You totally don't have a tell."

  
"Alright, shut up already." Eskel looked directly at her that time. Becca blessedly left it alone and didn't say anything again.

  
They stood there, steeped in a gentle quiet, as the microwave hummed. After a prolonged silence, as Eskel reached for the warmed bowl straight out of the microwave, he bravely mumbled something. "What was that?" Becca slid a little bit closer.

  
"I said thank you." Eskel pressed out.

  
"For what?" She seemed genuinely surprised.

  
"For being kind, about... all of this." Eskel gestured to his face.

  
"For what? Your scars?" Becca's brows knit together. "I didn't really... Do anything."

  
"That's just it. I know it isn't pleasant to look at, but..." Eskel huffed. He restrained himself from touching them again. "At least you don't look ill when you look at me."

  
The quiet stretched on between them. Eskel avoided looking at her, but Becca watched him as she worked through all he had said in her head. Eskel had sat down at the breakfast nook, determined not to look at her. After just a moment more, Becca came closer and sat in the chair next to him.

  
"Eskel," She began carefully. "We're friends." She asserted. "We can speak candidly with one another."

  
Eskel didn't know if he was intentionally holding his breath. He nodded nonetheless.

  
"So I'm just trying to figure out, and you'll have to excuse me if I say something stupid-" Eskel looked at her pointedly. "Again." She admitted. "But Eskel... Do you REALLY think I'd be horrified of your face?"

  
He couldn't find the words to say anything, so he just remained quiet.

  
"Eskel look at me." Becca requested. He obliged. "Sure, I can see the scars on your face, but that doesn't make it grotesque or ugly. You don't have to thank me for that."

  
Eskel looked down, burying his gaze in the reheated leftovers. Rather than saying anything, he tried to deflect by eating. Unexpectedly, he felt the softest touch to his right cheek. His eyes shot up, but the shock prevented him from pulling away. Swallowing, out of necessity and nerves, he watched Becca's pursed lips spread into a sad smile.

  
"A couple of scars doesn't make your face less handsome. I'm sorry if you feel that way." The pad of her thumb stroked over his scar gently. "And you saved my life, so it'd be rude of me to think anything bad about you or your face."

  
Eskel sat in stunned silence, seconds feeling like hours. Finally he ground out, "thank you." Becca smiled softly and pulled away. Eskel felt the loss, but now wasn't the time to say anything.

  
"I know you're weird about touch, but... I didn't think you'd believe me otherwise." Becca practically whispered it in the frail quiet between them.

  
"Just... Don't often feel a kind touch is all." Eskel's throat suddenly felt very dry. The bubbling feeling in his gut was at a full boil.

  
"Well..." Becca breathed. "I can do something about that.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Is this kind of a turning point in the story?  
> I guess.
> 
> But this needed to happen.  
> Eskel is a bit of a sensitive boy, he needs the reassurance of the people close in his life.  
> A little love.
> 
> But it's still not a love story. You'll see.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "What happened?" She shouted, rushing forward. 
> 
> "'m fine." Geralt hissed.
> 
> "Uh, blood pouring from the side of your body is categorically NOT fine!" 
> 
> OR  
> Friends do things for their friends. And sometimes those things involve blood. Also, Geralt as a patient is not the best... but not the worst.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have gotten some very sweet messages about this fic, and I have deeply loved every single one of them. I cannot say enough how happy I am that people are enjoying themselves or how delighted it makes me to hear about the parts of Becca that you've enjoyed.
> 
> There are still many chapters for me to post, but I will report to you (albeit bittersweetly) that I am very close to finishing the writing. I always knew how I wanted this story to end. How it should end. How it has to end. Although this chapter is not that ending, I truly hope that all of my readers will continue to enjoy the time we have left. Hopefully my story of these friends will have a valuable impact on you.
> 
> All my love.

The night was stretching on, and after hours of reading and lounging Becca could feel a tiredness aching in her bones. She had to stay awake. Jaskier had promised he would be back soon with late-night snacks. Of course he had said that twenty minutes ago, and estimating time was not his forte. But even still, it wasn't terribly late; a little after ten by the face of the nearest clock.

  
They were having a casual night, Becca doing some further reading while Jaskier messed around with chords and progressions to fit with lyrics. When Jaskier had asked her over, Becca had already changed into comfy clothes and thrown her hair up into a messy bun, by no means intending to go out, but Jaskier promised that they would just be relaxing. Not like the other two times he had promised they would hang out only to drag her around the city. 

  
So Becca slid further into the couch of the library wearing shorts and a large hoodie, feeling at ease. Until the door slammed open.

  
The sensation to jump up was practically involuntary, and Becca knew before she even reached the door that this was most certainly NOT Jaskier returning. By the tone of the grunts and curses, it sounded like Geralt. Now, Becca didn't know what she was expecting, but it certainly wasn't blood soaking the entire left side of Geralt's body.

  
"What happened?" She shouted, rushing forward. 

  
"'m fine." Geralt hissed.

  
"Uh, blood pouring from the side of your body is categorically NOT fine!" Becca frowned severely and tried to get a closer look. "This needs to be bandaged."

  
"I said I'm fine." Geralt insisted. "Just need to lay down.

  
"Oh yeah? And who's gonna do the laundry when you bleed all over everything?" Becca scolded. "Probably me, because I'll feel bad for letting it happen. Now, fuck, where are the bandages?"

  
"Leave it alone!" Geralt swatted at her hands, but he couldn't disguise the way he wobbled when that hand wasn't bracing him against the wall.

  
"Dammit Geralt! I could do without you being so thick! Just tell me where the fucking bandages are!" Becca watched as Geralt refused her again through silence. "Come on, Jaskier will never forgive me if I don't try to help."

  
That seemed to soften him a bit, because after a moment Geralt sighed and spoke, "cabinet above the microwave."

  
"Good. Alright come on," Becca reached out and took him gently by the arm. "You need to sit down." 

  
They made their way to the kitchen, and after dropping Geralt into the first chair that was available Becca hurried to the cabinet to pull out the necessary supplies. She dropped them on the table and Geralt spoke again, "Wait. Need a potion first. Should be in the refrigerator door."

  
"Uhhhh, what's it look like?" Becca scanned over a number of bottles in the door, not having the slightest clue which one to grab.

  
"Long neck."

  
"Ah, found it." She pulled it from the door, uncorking it and giving it a cursory whiff. The scent was strong and fairly unpleasant. Coughing with the intensity of it she passed it to Geralt. "That smells awful. But I think I've put worse things in my body." Geralt gave her a look as he drank, and Becca tried to explain herself. "I went to college, like a third of it was drinking bad, bottom shelf booze." She actually gave half of a laugh. 

  
With the potion drank, there was no avoiding what had to happen next. "Alright, whip your shirt off." Geralt didn't look particularly pleased by that. "Oh get over yourself, that thing is dripping blood and we're already past the point of embarrassment." 

  
"Hm." Geralt huffed, but moved to remove the shirt anyway. Thankfully, he still had a pretty good range of motion and was able to take care of it himself. Becca dutifully put on the gloves she found with the first aid supplies. Now that she got a better look at it, the wound was longer than it was deep, which would explain the mess. There was nothing else to do besides to begin to clean the area, and she afforded Geralt the small blessing of doing it quietly and without much fuss. Geralt didn't even blink at the iodine touching the wound, and Becca mentally filed away just how hardcore Witchers really were. The bleeding had slowed, so with a few layers of gauze Geralt was almost patched up.

  
"You know," Becca began as Geralt helped to wrap the bandages around his torso. "I'm actually impressed."

  
"About what?" Geralt grumbled.

  
"That I didn't pass out." Becca chuckled when Geralt looked at her with concern. "I have historically not been the greatest with blood. Mostly my own, but you know... I usually pass out."

  
"What?" Geralt actually sounded a touch concerned.

  
"But I didn't! I think I'm turning a corner."

  
"Hm." Geralt replied almost fondly. "Thanks."

  
"Yeah well, in addition to doing it for your darling, it was also the right thing to do. And I don't wanna say it runs in the family, but my grandma was a nurse, and I have EXCELLENT bedside manner." Becca smiled. "Or, well, chairside manner."

  
"It won't take long to heal." Geralt said. "But you were right... About the blood."

  
"Hm." Becca huffed fondly. Geralt of course could be incredibly bull headed and stubborn, as apparently was a trait of all the Witchers Becca had encountered, but thankfully she had a good trump card up her sleeve. Fortunately for Geralt, Becca had become much more adept at letting things lapse into easy silence since their first acquaintance, so as they cleaned up the kitchen she didn't feel it quite as necessary to fill it with idle chatter.

  
As Becca picked up the bloody shirt to toss it, the front door swung open again and Jaskier's boisterous voice carried through the air.

  
"I brought tacos! And a surprise-er, where did you go?"

  
"In the kitchen." Becca called. Jaskier hurried back, but the smile dropped from his face as soon as he laid eyes on the scene. Quickly, he sat all that he was carrying on the counter and rushed to lay his hands on Geralt.

  
"What happened to you? Are you alright?" He touched Geralt's shoulders, caressed his face, and even ran his fingers through his hair.

  
"I'm fine. Even got patched up." Geralt glanced to Becca who had tossed his shirt and was peeling off her gloves. She gave a small smile back. Jaskier looked from the bandages to Becca, eyes turning soft and appreciative once he realized what must have happened. 

  
He stepped to her, taking a hand and holding it. "I knew there was a reason I liked you."

  
"Just one?" Becca replied. They laughed for a few seconds. "Alright come on, I'm hungry. You kept me waiting for an eternity!"

  
"I wanted to get something extra." Jaskier defended. "And to be honest now, I think we could all use one." Jaskier rummaged around in the things he had brought in until he pulled out a set of bottles. "I brought street tacos and margaritas."

  
"Thank _God_! Anything to get all of that blood outta my mind." Becca reached for one of the bottles appreciatively. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes in life... it is important to know when to pick your battles.
> 
> And sometimes, even those battles can injure you.
> 
> When your a witcher you don't necessarily NEED someone to bandage your wounds, but it is nice to know that someone cares enough.  
> Even if there is the looming threat of them becoming the one YOU need to take care of.
> 
> But sometimes, just letting someone take care of you is a meaningful action.


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Do you know something about me I don’t.”
> 
> “Well,” ‘Yes’ he thought, but maybe a few months in wasn’t the best time to drop the bomb that Witcher’s had a knack for picking up on subtle mood shifts on the air. “No. What makes you think that?”
> 
> OR  
> These two need to have a serious conversation, about a serious topic.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things have ben going well around here. A little TOO well.
> 
> Allow me to remedy that...

The air smelled like meat. Hamburger? Beef for sure. Still, Eskel needed to ask.

  
“What are you doing?”

  
“Making dinner?” Becca looked a bit confused.

  
“But... you don’t have to.” Eskel stepped fully into the kitchen.

  
“Well that didn’t stop anyone from eating the last three dinners I broke in and made.” Becca shrugged, returning to stirring the meat. Definitely hamburger.

  
“You..?”

  
“I didn’t actually break in. You would’ve known.” Becca reassured him. “No, Jaskier let me in.”

  
“And where is Jaskier? Or Geralt?”

  
“They ran out to get ready for his show tonight. I told them I would have dinner ready by 6 and to make sure to be back.” Becca turned to Eskel. “I guess you’re going to want something to eat too? Darn, wish I had known, I would have mashed up some peas or something.”

  
“Fuck, you’re still on that?” Eskel groaned.

  
“You did whine for a long time about the soap. Sorry it wasn’t to your specifications, but in my defense, when I offered to pick some things up from the store I didn’t honestly expect you’d send me with a whole list.”

  
“What happened to that timid and annoying girl that would make food and then _LEAVE_?” Eskel gave Becca a pointed look.

  
“You, your brother, and your brother’s boyfriend made the mistake of befriending her, and now that she knows you...” Becca smiled impishly. “It’s become easier to taunt you.”

  
“Hm.” Eskel sighed. 

  
“It’s not all bad, I’ve become way more confident! Something I was, to be honest, kinda desperately in need of when we first met.” 

  
“Oh so it wasn’t confidence when you stalked Jaskier to find this place and demanded that we let you interrogate us?” Eskel leaned against the counter, watching the confident smile fall from Becca’s face. “You could have fooled me.”

  
“That was stupid, mostly. I’m still a little surprised it worked.” Becca chuckled. “But no, I’m all confidence now.”

  
“Sure.” Eskel laughed. “ _ALL_ confidence? That’s what you wanna go with?”

  
“Well why shouldn’t I?” Becca’s face fell, almost concerned. “Do you know something about me I don’t.”

  
“Well,” ‘Yes’ he thought, but maybe a few months in wasn’t the best time to drop the bomb that Witcher’s had a knack for picking up on subtle mood shifts on the air. “No. What makes you think that?”

  
“You’re a shitty liar, as we’ve established already.”

  
“Listen, it’s not worth fighting over. It’s just that, there are certain skills that-“ 

  
“Like scenting.” Becca raises her eyebrows. Eskel dropped silent as she stared at him. “Yeah. Read that in a book on Witcher anatomy. No one thought it was maybe important to mention that your noses are so sharp you can _LITERALLY smell emotions_?!”

  
“It never came up.” Eskel defended. “And it’s not like it changes anything, there’s nothing you did.”

  
“Yeah, well, I still have some regrets.” Becca spoke, barely upset at this point. “Mostly about the amount and quality of perfume I wore in the early days. That was not a good look.”

  
“I have some regrets about that too.”

  
“Oh shut up!” Lashing out with the spatula, Becca chuckled when Eskel let it hit him on the arm. “At any rate, I’m more confident than I was.”

  
“Still,” Eskel began, watching Becca return to her skillet. “There’s this undercurrent of... nervousness? Or anxiety?”

  
Suddenly the air between them was much more tense, and the anxious energy and smell of Becca spiked. She looked to Eskel with an expression like he’d discovered her most terrible secret. Quickly she tried to calm it down and schooled her voice to give a careful response. “Well... I’ve always been an anxious person.”

  
“You don’t have to be.” Eskel insisted. “Not when you’re here. No one is going to hurt you, and nothing will happen to you.”

  
“No, I know.” Becca said softly, and her expression turned sad. “And, that’s nice of you to say. But I mean, anxiety isn’t just something you can... logic away. It’s not really something you can much of anything away. ... it just, IS.”

  
The words hung between them, and even though she tried desperately to smile, Becca’s expression just looked sad and almost beaten somehow. 

  
“But, I absolutely hear the intent behind your words.” She said quietly. “And it really does mean something to me to know that you want me to feel safe. But... I just need us to be on the same page, that you can’t just... take away something like this.”

  
“I know.” Eskel mumbled.

  
“It doesn’t mean it’s not hard.” She smiled like she knew all too well about hardship. “Believe me, there’s plenty of stuff I would take away, from all of us, if I could. To make life easier, or-“

  
“But you can’t.” Eskel said understanding. He knew intimately what it felt like to be powerless to change suffering.

  
“But I cant.” Becca confirmed. “But, all three of you really have made me a better person.”

  
“It’s been mutual.” Eskel smiled. “You’ve even made Geralt just a little more bearable.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In all seriousness, it is important to address that things like anxiety and mental illnesses, no matter how severe, aren't something that can be taken away from the people you care about. Even in a world of magic, some suffering just can't be undone.
> 
> Whether its your friends, your family, or your loved ones, we all have people that we wish we could take things away from. That's what makes us human.
> 
> Some suffering is worse than others, but no matter what the suffering there is always someone who wishes that they could make it better.
> 
> I know that there are a lot of people in the world suffering right now, and I wish with my whole heart that I could stop it or take it away. But I can't.
> 
> Please... keep yourselves and the people you care about safe. Be careful. And I hope we can all come out on the right side of history.


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I saw that." He smiled self-satisfactorily.
> 
> "Saw what?" Becca asked. She looked, to her credit, genuinely confused, but Jaskier could see the wheels in motion no matter what she said.
> 
> "All of that," Jaskier waved vaguely. "With Eskel. You like him."
> 
> OR  
> Jaskier thinks he is going to have a friendly conversation about attraction and emotions, but he couldn't predict how it would turn out. Things are more complicated than they seem on the surface.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello!   
> This chapter is going up a bit later than I had planned for it, but I've been preoccupied with some stuff happening in life, and well..  
> I think in some way I'm trying to delay the end.
> 
> Which reminds me! Please read the end note to weigh in with your opinion on something very important.
> 
> Otherwise, I hope you enjoy this sort of dramatic chapter!

Jaskier had not meant to eavesdrop. He wasn't even eavesdropping, in the traditional sense of the word, just happened to overhear conversation that wasn't meant for him but also wasn't exactly private. It mostly happened in his vacinity. The two of them had started chatting while Jaskier got ready to go onstage for the gig at his regular club, and there was nothing unusual about two friends talking. That was, until...

  
"Are you... Using a new soap?" Eskel suddenly asked.

  
"Oh, yeah." Becca responded. "I'm trying to use very light to minimal fragrances now that I know how sensitive your nose is. This one is cucumber." She smiled sweetly.

  
"It's... Nice." Eskel smiled too. Very softly, and in that fond way Jaskier saw on rare and blessed occasions.

  
"Well," Becca smiled even more, and Jaskier could swear she broke eye contact to sweep up and down briefly. "Noted."

  
Jaskier suddenly cleared his throat. "Eskel, could you do me a huge favor? Find out what's keeping Geralt? I could have sworn he should be back by now."

  
Eskel sighed but strode to exit the room muttering about "my brother's keeper" or something else mildly sour. Jaskier waited patiently for him to leave before lunging at Becca.

  
"I saw that." He smiled self-satisfactorily.

  
"Saw what?" Becca asked. She looked, to her credit, genuinely confused, but Jaskier could see the wheels in motion no matter what she said.

  
"All of that," Jaskier waved vaguely. "With Eskel. You like him."

  
"I mean, he is my friend. So I feel like I ought to like him." Becca was looking at Jaskier a bit oddly, like he'd sprouted another eye or something. He was currently staring her down with the two he had.

  
"You know what I mean." Jaskier insisted.

  
"I'm not sure that I do." Becca raised an eyebrow. "Can you just say it, instead of making us play this game."

  
"I saw the two of you talking, all flirty and romantic-like." Jaskier leaned in and gave a sly smile. "An excellent choice by the way, my compliments, a real looker. Rugged handsomeness clearly runs in the family, and we're I not otherwise taken I would consider-"

  
"I... Wh-" Becca laughed awkwardly. She tried to find the words to speak, but she was speechless and completely blindsided. She went on a face journey from good natured but confused, through nervous and dawning realization, finally reaching understanding and annoyance. "Jaskier, no."

  
"But darling-"

  
" _No_." Becca responded firmly. "I will not be thrust together with your boyfriend's brother just because you think it's cute or whatever. Can't the two of us simply be friends without it turning into a whole _THING_?"

  
"I know the last time we had this conversation you insisted there was no one in the running, but I am telling you that there is someone in the running, you just need to let him into the race." Jaskier gripped her by the shoulders and looked at her meaningfully, but the sour expression on Becca's face didn't budge.

  
"I said no." She sounded more annoyed than before. "I will not date Eskel. The last thing this quartet needs is two sets of couples."

  
"But Becca, I think it could be very good for you!" Jaskier insisted. That caused Becca to rip herself out of his grasp, stepping back from him.

  
"You don't know what's good for me! You're only thinking about what you would do in this situation! Well I'm not you, Julian-" the use of his given name stung like a smack. "Honestly, we couldn't be more fundamentally different when it comes to this!"

  
"I just thought..." Jaskier felt his happy mood sagging. 

  
"Just, stop okay? Even if it was what I wanted, I'm- I'm just..." Becca's face flickered into the saddest expression Jaskier had seen her wear before flaring back to annoyance. "I'm not ready."

  
"Ready for what?" Jaskier breathed. He didn't understand, did she really hate the thought that much? He had only thought that they were getting along so well, what was missing?

  
"Just, drop it." Becca made a dismissive gesture at him. As she turned away she spoke, "And leave me alone for a while." And she left.

  
"I-" Jaskier felt everything he wanted to say die on his lips. Watching his friend storm out of the room felt like a crack in his heart. He wanted to feel like they could share everything, but clearly there were still some things that she was unable to talk to him about. He stood there in the silence for a few more moments before the door was filled again.

  
"Jaskier." It was Geralt's voice, but Jaskier couldn't stop the sad look on his face. "What's wrong?"

  
"I... It's nothing." Jaskier tried to brush it off. "Nothing you can fix."

  
"What happened to Becca?" Jaskier looked to Eskel who still stood in the doorway. "She was in here with you when I left."

  
"She uh... Needed to leave for something." Jaskier lied. After a moment or two of silence, Jaskier walked toward Eskel. "Hey, can I ask you a question?"

  
"You're going to anyway." Eskel replied. Jaskier almost laughed.

  
"Do you... Like her?" Jaskier asked. "Becca?"

  
"I mean... Yes?" Eskel looked a bit confused. "She's... nice. And pleasant to be around."

  
"Right, but..." Jaskier swallowed, trying to carefully approach the subject. "Do you **LIKE** her? In _that_ way?"

  
Eskel was quiet for a moment. Even Geralt was watching and waiting with a silent intensity. Jaskier could feel the nervous energy bubble in his chest as he waited for the answer. Finally, Eskel sighed and glanced away. He looked back with a somewhat tired expression.

  
"Why try to complicate it? I'm not angry about the way that things are." Eskel responded plainly. "Sometimes it's best to just leave well enough alone."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In bittersweet news I have officially written the last chapter of this fic. Which makes me sad, bc I really love this little story I've created, but as I said before, I knew how it needed to end when I began it.
> 
> BUT!! you, my darling readers, have the chance to weigh in on something I have been going back and forth on for a bit.  
> I want to know if the reader base for this story (small yet mighty as it may be) would be interested or consider a sequel or continuation after the main storyline in this fic.   
> Partially it is because I am afraid people will be upset/sad with how this story needs to end and I want to fix that in some way. Partially it is because I had some really fun ideas for the characters that just couldn't happen without some development.   
> The sequel would of course have a new storyline, but continue with elements of this story, and would introduce more beloved Witcher characters to play with.  
> But I would hate to put the effort into something like this if people are not interested. So if you would even consider reading a sequel, let me know so I can make an informed decision about what to do. Feel free to contact me any way you like!
> 
> And as always, thank you for reading!


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everything had been tense, between all of them really. After a whole week they had barely improved from where the conversation had been left in the club.
> 
> OR  
> It's not exactly the resolution anyone had been hoping for. Maybe it's not even a resolution.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Really truthfully, I'm not going to lie...  
> I really loved writing this chapter. 
> 
> ((I still haven't made a decision about whether I will write a sequel or not. I'm trying to see if I even have the motivation for it at the moment.))

Everything had been tense, between all of them really. After a whole week they had barely improved from where the conversation had been left in the club. Becca had mostly forgiven Jaskier as long as he didn't try to talk about it, but Jaskier regretted that she wasn't smiling quite as much. Becca was polite and friendly with them, but had all but lost that comfort and closeness from before. She would pull back from unconscious movements to touch, and made less eye contact in case it could be misinterpreted.

  
Most regrettably, it was obvious that the relationship between her and Eskel was different now. No matter what it was she tried to do it was plain to see the wheels spinning inside her head to weigh the action and decide if she should follow through. Eskel tried to assure everyone that he was fine, that it didn't matter that she wasn't casually touching him or smiling brightly at him, or even just looking at him as much. It clearly had an impact on his mood, but he made a valiant effort not to take it out on anyone.

  
Jaskier knew that there wasn't much he could do, but he still wished that he could take back all he had said. If he hadn't tried to get involved then Becca wouldn't have gotten upset and nothing would have changed. Maybe something might have developed and maybe nothing would have developed, but either one had to be better than what they were living through. 

  
He expressed as much to Geralt, who was no help.

  
"You shouldn't have said anything" Geralt had told him as much a dozen times. It was not the reassurance Jaskier wanted or needed, even if it was true.

  
"I know!" Jaskier sighed. "But I couldn't have known that there was _something ELSE_ going on in her head." Jaskier tried and failed to twirl his pen around his fingers. "This is all my fault."

  
"It is." Geralt agreed from his spot mixing potions.

  
"You're a dick for agreeing." Jaskier huffed. "You're supposed to make me feel _better_ , darling."

  
"What would you have me say? That it’s not your fault?” Geralt looked at Jaskier with a slight accusatory look.

  
“I guess not.” Jaskier conceded. “I just need to know how to fix it.” Watching Geralt was pleasant simply on the average, but Jaskier watched his boyfriend intensely as if witnessing the making of potions would answer all of his questions. “Are you two going out tonight?”

  
“Yes.” Geralt’s eyes flashed up to Jaskier. “You shouldn’t come.”

  
“Shouldn’t doesn’t mean can’t.” Jaskier starts to split into a grin.

  
“Jaskier-“

  
“Come on! What brings people closer than going hunting together?”

  
“Plenty of things.” Geralt huffed.

  
“We’re going. Besides, Becca likes to go on hunts when we can! It gives her lots of material to note for her research.” Jaskier reasoned.

  
“And you’re totally innocent.” Geralt grunted.

  
“Well... if I happen to look intently at your ass, or find it super erotic to watch you bodily take down monsters, it can be our little secret.” Jaskier winked and smiled wickedly.

  
~~~

  
“It won’t be too dangerous, I assume?” Becca questioned.

  
“We can never be sure, but it shouldn’t be too bad.” Eskel responded. He was working on packing a few things in preparation. The swords on his back almost knocked into Becca twice, but there wasn’t much distance to get away as the storage room was rather small.

  
“Well, I guess.” She said mildly. The two stood there in a beat of silence until Eskel suddenly turned around to face Becca. 

  
Before she could speak or turn away, he pressed something into her hands, holding them momentarily. “Just in case.”

  
“Uh...” looking down at where his hands clasped over hers, feeling the weight of what he pressed there, Becca noticed that it was a dagger in a sheath and a leather belt.

  
“It’s silver.” He said. His hands dropped but he didn’t step away. “You know, _for just in case_.”

  
“Right.” Becca agreed. Holding the dagger she nodded, glancing at Eskel a few times but avoiding prolonged eye contact. “Just in case.”

  
~~~

  
It wasn’t every time that the four of them went out together and got into danger. Often, the Witcher’s refused to take the humans if they suspected for a moment that there was any more danger than a skinned knee or some minor scuffs from any brush they may pass through. But anything could happen.

  
They had been so sure that this was a false alarm that some of the precaution had maybe lapsed. The old cemetery was so silent. Until it wasn’t.

  
The suspicious rustling rapidly turned into threat rushing toward them. An Alp, a type of womanoid vampire, someone had said. Not the most dangerous thing to encounter, but pretty determined. Geralt had pushed Jaskier and Becca back as quickly as he could. Becca clutched Jaskier’s wrist as she began to drag him away, the two of them running in tandem. At some point in their fleeing Jaskier had begun to pull ahead and as he whipped around he realized why.

  
Becca was laden down with a sack of potions she had offered to carry when they had all mistakenly believed they were out of danger. As Jaskier tried to pull her faster he tripped and fell over a tree root in his attempt to run backwards. He landed against the base of the tree, and before he could take Becca’s hand to get up he screamed.

  
“Run!” Rapidly approaching from behind her was another Alp, or the same one, he couldn’t tell. She ran at Jaskier, trying to make him a meal, but with a flash of silver she was momentarily stopped. Lightning fast and not knowing what else to try, Becca had drawn her _JUST IN CASE_ dagger from her hip and sliced into the Alp’s collarbone. It succeeded in stopping the pursuit of Jaskier, allowing him to get away quickly, but now Becca was it’s focus.

  
The scream that left that creature was deafening and powerful. It threw Becca back a few feet before a strong arm caught her and twisted to put a strong body between her and the Alp. Moving on instinct, Eskel pulled Becca close and cast _Quen_ to protect them from the incapacitating screech of the Alp. They were still forced up against the side of a mausoleum with the force of it, but the impact was far lessened.

  
Becca smelled like the sharp bite of fear and adrenaline, but as she looked up at Eskel from where he held her, there was a wave of astonishment. He had protected her.

  
At the first opportunity Eskel let her go and told her “RUN! Don’t look back!” Moving fast as her legs would carry her, Becca set off. The glass bottles clacked together at her side and she felt her lungs burning with the effort, but still she ran. She couldn’t, wouldn’t, stop. Tears streamed from her face as she ran, trying to put as much space between her and the monster as she could, but worrying for her friends. Was Jaskier okay? Had that screech affected him as well? Where was Geralt? How many of these Alps were there? There were so many questions that she got no answers to. Her legs felt like they would give out under her at any moment. 

  
When she hit the paved surface of one of the service roads, the difference in ground texture made her lose her footing. Becca tumbled to the ground, the entire right side of her body hitting the pavement and the momentum of her running carrying her into a roll into the bushes off the other side.

  
“Ahg, FUCK!” she cried, trying to hold back tears. Her right side was set aflame with the burn from the pavement, and it felt like the wind was knocked out of her. She didn’t know how long she laid there trying to catch her breath and get up. The world was spinning. Distantly she could hear voices calling her name.

  
It took every ounce of focus she had to roll over so she could sit up. Through the haze she could see figures rushing in her direction. Her hip felt wet, and the brief thought that it was blood passed through her head. With leaden extremities Becca was able to pull herself up onto shaking legs.

  
Geralt and Eskel approached, concern etched into their features. Jaskier must have been close behind, there was way he would leave without searching for her as well. Becca felt herself take a deeper breath and exhale in a bit of relief. She could tell the two were trying to say something to her, but everything was distorted and fizzling at the edges. It was as if the world had suddenly been switched to static. It felt like too much to even try to look at them. 

  
With great effort Becca tried to speak, but everything came out slurred and just sounding like “fffffffvvvfffffff shhhhhhhhh.” Eskel reached for her and Becca tried to step forward. 

  
Her knees buckled. Her vision converged into tunnel vision before closing to black.

  
**She collapsed.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know that it is really evil of me to end a chapter like this.
> 
> But look on the bright side! On the re-read after everything is finished you wont have to wait for the next chapter after this cliffhanger.
> 
> And believe me, I am strongly committed to not killing characters, so you can relax a little.
> 
> Let me know what you think! Any comments brighten my otherwise pretty uneventful days. I'll be better about replying to them.


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Her knees buckled. Her vision converged into tunnel vision before closing to black.
> 
> She collapsed.
> 
> OR
> 
> The natural progression of events following a poor human falling unconscious.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Allow me to preface this chapter with the note that I absolutely DID NOT intend to wait this long before updating. But, life has been busy, and I've been distracted with other things, and trying to find motivation, and about a million other excuses.
> 
> And I recognize the irony of the dilemma that I left being a cliff hanger between such a long update. Believe me, I am sorry about that. 
> 
> But hopefully this chapter will soothe and alleviate some of the frustrations.

There had been frantic shouting and shaking. Becca had been gripped tight as they all panicked and worried over her. It had been chaos.

  
But as Becca opened her eyes and felt the cool tickle of grass on her cheek, she was filled with an overwhelming sense of calm. Her eyes were eventually able to focus on the fire a short distance away and the flames flickered with hints of colors fading behind in afterimages. As consciousness came back to her slowly, her head hurt and her mouth was dry like cotton. She tried to get up from her position on her side, but a firm guiding hand pressed her back down.

  
“Don’t get up.” It was Eskel’s voice, from right behind her. Something about knowing he was there soothed her in an unexpected way. “You crashed hard. Really worried us all.”

  
“What, mn...” Becca rubbed at her face, trying to relieve some of the pain. Vaguely, she was aware of wearing a jacket that did not belong to her. “What happened?”

  
“When you fell on the pavement, you beat yourself up pretty bad, but the force also smashed a number of the potions. You inhaled a lot of vapors.” Eskel explained. Becca could feel him move some of the hair that had fallen into her face. It was almost pleasant, the gentle caring touches, but Becca was slowly feeling more and more pain. “A couple of the ones that broke are pretty rough stuff. Your clothes were soaked with it, had to get it off of you.” That explained the different coat. “Can’t be certain, but I’m afraid some of the broken White Gull might have gotten into the wounds all over your side. That stuff is a powerful hallucinogen for Witcher’s, I can’t imagine the havoc it must be trying to wreak on your body.” He sounded so regretful.

  
“‘S not your fault.” Becca pushed out. He had to know. Nothing that had happened could have been stopped. Again she tried to sit up. “Let me get up, I’ll be fine.” Eskel allowed her to sit up carefully and once she made it to sitting she leaned against his shoulder for support, still feeling light headed.

“Are you okay?” She asked.

“I’m fine.” Eskel chuckled breathily. “Shit, only you could be worried about a Witcher like me after getting knocked out on the wildest concoction of potions this century.”

  
“Hm.” Becca smiled weakly. “It was like passing out and being under anesthesia, but harder.”

  
“We’re lucky it didn’t kill you.” Eskel said seriously.

  
“Well, I’ve always been a tough cookie.” She looked up at him through half lidded eyes trying to smile. She was weak, but alive and awake, and that’s all that mattered. “Where are the other two?”

  
“They went to get some supplies. We couldn’t move you far, so we made the decision that they would run to the nearest shop for some food, water, and medicine while I camped out and watched over you. Hopefully they can find a new shirt for you too, can’t just leave you in a jacket.”

  
“Hm, you really need to start carrying a first aid kit around with you two.” Becca spoke languidly. “You could tend at least some of your wounds immediately.”

  
“They heal over eventually.”

  
“Still,” She insisted. “You could do yourselves at least that one small mercy.”

  
They sat there in silence for a while, just listening to the small fire crackle and give off the slightest bit of heat. The dull throbbing in Becca’s head was subsiding, but she still felt weak.

  
“I’m sorry.” She mumbled into the quiet. “For treating you differently after that whole exchange with Jaskier.”

  
“You don’t have to apologize.” Eskel replied.

  
“But I do. It wasn’t fair to keep my distance out of fear for things getting mixed up and misinterpreted.” Becca blinked at the fire that came into focus more as the hallucinations wore off. “I’m just... kinda fucked up, but you shouldn’t have to suffer for that.”

  
“It’s fine.” Eskel wrapped an arm around her, holding securely. “I don’t blame you for anything. You don’t owe me anything. You don’t need to explain anything.”

  
“I will someday.” Becca nudged closer into his shoulder. “But after Jaskier drew attention to it, I got really self-conscious about how close and familiar I was acting with you." Becca's voice wavered just slightly, but she soldiered on. "In a lot of ways that’s just how I am, physical and close to the people I care about.” Becca paused, wetting her dry lips. “I just... never felt like I had to be worried around all of you. You never made me feel like it was a problem.”

  
“It isn’t.” Eskel insisted. He felt the warm flare of fondness in his chest again as Becca drew closer than she had been in a week. “You don’t have to worry, I really don’t mind.”

  
“I just... hate how things have been.”

  
“Then let's just go back to the way things were.” Eskel offered. “I wasn’t upset about it. It was... nice.”

  
“Nice...” Becca smiled. “You’re so descriptive, you know?”

  
“I don’t have any misconceptions about what’s going on. I understand if...” The phrase hung uncompleted in the air. “Just do whatever you want. I will tell you if it’s unappreciated. But you haven’t done anything wrong.”

  
“Okay. I promise.” Becca whispered. As she leaned against Eskel’s shoulder she looked up to the night sky wondering when it had gotten so dark. There was no way to know how long she had been out, the sun was barely set when they had started this hunt, but rather than worry about it Becca just looked at the stars. “It sure is a clear night.”

  
“It is.” Eskel agreed. “Plenty of stars out.”

  
“There sure are.” She smiled easily.

  
“Not to backtrack too far,” Eskel began. “But, how do you know what anesthesia feels like?”

  
“I had to get my wisdom teeth taken out my first year of college.” Becca replied, smiling. “They knock you out to work in there. It’s not so bad though, I thought it was like very restful sleep. Almost like floating.”

  
“Floating?” Eskel chuckled. “Are you sure you’re not still high on White Gull?”

  
“It’s tough to say. Does this White Gull make you seem like a more agreeable person?”

  
“Says the one who’s practically asleep on my shoulder.”

  
“It’s not my fault.” Becca grinned. “I blame it on the drugs.”

  
“I won’t complain.” Eskel said, his arm twitching just a little tighter around her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know if there is a really good way to describe being under anesthesia, but at least in all of my experiences with it, it has pretty much just felt like being asleep. And I'm not saying explicitly that I had in my search history things like, "Drugs that will knock you out" or "things that will cause you to pass out" to try and make this as accurate as possible while writing... but if a lot of this description comes from any personal experiences I have, you will just have to assume that any research I tried to conduct was ultimately... fruitless. 
> 
> Truthfully I am a bit sad and nervous to have this story nearing a foreseeable end, and because of that I have been steadily trying to motivate myself to write any continuation which has not been the EASIEST. 
> 
> But I am sorry for the long and unexpected wait. It really wasn't my intention to do that.
> 
> As always I relish any feedback or commentary. I know mine is not the BEST work of fiction out there, I humbly accept my own limitations, but I am truly grateful for the love that I've been shown for this. <3


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “What did you do while I was gone?”
> 
> OR  
> Our protagonist needs to take care of some business by herself. What will the boys get up to while she's away?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We are officially nearing the home stretch. I know, I finally put the final chapter number up!
> 
> There are a few things that need to happen before we can enter the end. None of them happen in this chapter.
> 
> More than anything, I wrote this to assert that YES she is still absolutely working on the research part of this... and from personal experience sometimes you really do just have to consult someone who is better at research than you. I dunno about you, but I had super great college profs who would 100% help an alumni with a situation like this.
> 
> So enjoy a chapter that is still relevant to development, but is the last low stakes chapter that I will ever post of this fic.

“It is not that dangerous.” She insisted. “I have driven there and back plenty of times before. It’s a two day round trip, three if I have any trouble or get caught by a lot of friends.”

  
“Do you have to go?” Jaskier asked. “Not to have so little faith, but this place may quite literally fall apart without you.”

  
Becca smiled. “I’m sure you boys will be fine. It’s only the weekend and I REALLY need to talk to this professor in person. I’ve hit a lot of medieval Witcher lore, which is great! But I can’t make sense of any of it without some context for the time period.” She looked a little apologetic. “I never really studied anything before the 18th century, and even then it was mostly American history in the New Republic.”

  
“I don’t know what any of that means.” Jaskier admitted. “I only took one history class, something about Western Music or what have you.” Becca raised an eyebrow in some variant of being unimpressed. “I thought you said you studied general history?”

  
“Well... there’s a lot there to learn.” Becca defended. “And besides, everyone kind of picks a track, and mine made more sense to go with more American history at the time, because that’s probably what I would have been teaching.”

  
“The school system does focus on American history.” Jaskier admitted. “I still can’t believe you were going to be a teacher. I mean, I _CAN_ believe it. You have the kind and compassionate nature for it, but if you had chosen to teach... we may never have met.”

  
“It’s not worth thinking about maybe’s.” Becca said. “I’m here now, at any rate, and I still need to go.”

  
“Fine, Fine, “ Jaskier waved. “Go already. I’ll hold down the fort while you’re gone. Nothing will get past me.”

  
“Yeah. I think not.” Becca chuckled. “I already told Geralt to be sure to have an extra close eye on you, and Eskel assures me that the three of you would probably be ordering out and working nonstop while I’m gone.” She watched as Jaskier’s face turned to indignant. “But! I’ll leave you in charge of fun. Don’t let things get _TOO_ serious around here.”

  
“You’ll only be gone for a few days. How bad could things go?” Jaskier smiled.

  
~~~

  
The first day was relatively uneventful. They had all stayed inside, true to form working intently, staying out of trouble and immediate danger. It was a Friday, so this routine was well established. However, when the evening hit something felt off about the whole thing.

  
The second day was no better, as it was hard to ignore the crushing weight of boredom as all three men realized that they had no idea what they should do. There was still work to be done, but thanks to the uninterrupted workflow the previous day, they were finished by the afternoon. 

  
After lunch Jaskier suggested that the two Witchers play a game of Gwent while he observed and plucked out a few chords. And that sounded like as good a suggestion as any, given their options. A few more rounds soaked up the next few hours, and Jaskier’s attempt to surprise by cooking dinner resulted in burned food and the unanimous decision to just call in a pizza.

  
On the third day, after a slow morning, Becca had called to say that she needed to take an extra day because she had fallen down a rabbit hole and had lost an entire evening and the following morning to drinking with her old friends. With nothing else to do, Jaskier suggested that he and Geralt go on a walk while Eskel worked on re-shelving some of the resources in the library.

  
The two Witchers had a hunt that night and came back with a few non life-threatening wounds, and quietly had a few beers as Jaskier performed a set at his usual club.

  
On the fourth day they all three felt the boredom that signaled their missing friend, and without much to think of doing they lazed around. Listening to the clocks ticking and chiming the hours, they waited. And waited. And waited.

  
Until finally the door clicked open.

  
Suddenly there were three sets of eyes watching as Becca walked into the hall.

  
“Hey Boys!” Becca smiled, a refreshing sight. “What did you do while I was gone?”

  
The three looked between each other quietly, trying to determine what they should say. Finally, Geralt of all people spoke up.

  
“Not much.” He said simply.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes it's just nice to be missed.
> 
> As always, I welcome any comments and feedback! 
> 
> How does it feel to stare at the inevitable end now?


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> His heart was laden with emotion. “The worst part is the scars. Being reminded of what happened and,” his heart grew even heavier, “and becoming monstrous.”
> 
> Her face was drawn into a sad expression and she watched Eskel, looking for something in his eyes. With a small voice she asked him, “do you really believe that about yourself?”
> 
> OR
> 
> Another emotional conversation between friends. Isn't it?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes it's really happening everyone. 
> 
> I mean... can a man not be soft? Can a man not have EMOTIONS? 
> 
> I imagine that Eskel particularly has a very complex relationship with scars. He tries to pretend that they don't bother him but... he's a sensitive boy.
> 
> Is it not enough to be seen and see in return, the very person you thought you knew? Can a moment not be shared over a few...stories?

“Ya know, being a nurse wasn’t exactly part of the friendship description.” Becca sighed. “Not that I resent helping, and I’m certainly not complaining about you asking for my help, but...” she frowned sadly. “Seeing you hurt just really tears me up inside.”

  
“It’ll be fine.” Eskel grunted. “It will heal fast enough and be just another scar.” He has said it matter of factly, and sounded so convinced that it was nothing to be concerned about.

  
“I’m allowed to be worried about you.” Becca carefully dabbed disinfectant into the wound. It was a series of claw marks in Eskel’s shoulder that were too far back to try and take care of himself. Fortunately Becca had been on hand and had gathered the materials before he had even said the words to ask her for help. “Does it hurt?” She asked.

  
“You get used to it.” Eskel didn’t shrug, not wanting to disturb the work she was doing.

  
“Maybe that’s the worst part. That you’ve gotten used to the pain.”

  
“No...” Eskel said it quietly. His heart was laden with emotion. “The worst part is the scars. Being reminded of what happened and,” his heart grew even heavier, “and becoming monstrous.”

  
The bandages went on quickly and silently. Becca came around to sit in front of Eskel and heaved out a heavy sigh. Her face was drawn into a sad expression and she watched Eskel, looking for something in his eyes. With a small voice she asked him, “do you really believe that about yourself?”

  
“That’s just how it is.” He replied. “I’m covered in scars, because I’m a Witcher.”

  
“So?” Becca looked at him, expression soft. “Everyone has scars, it’s a part of living. But it doesn’t mean anything about you. Hell, I have scars. Does that make me a monster?”

  
“That’s different.” Eskel knew she was just trying to make him feel better, but it _WAS_ different.

  
“You’re right.” Becca admitted. She scooted forward in her chair to brush knees with Eskel. “None of my scars are from protecting anyone or anything. They’re all from stupid things.” She looked into his eyes in earnest. “But they’re still scars. I’m still scarred.” Eskel looked at her, not knowing what to say. Whispering, as if her voice might break the fragile quiet, Becca said “I’ll show you, it’s nothing to be afraid of.”

  
Pushing a strand of hair behind her ear Becca smiled in an almost secretive way. She held out her right arm and pointed to a dark patch on the side of her forearm, just above her wrist. “Do you see that? That scar is from a mystery allergic reaction that created blisters on my skin. No one could figure out why it happened, and the dermatologist had to give me a shot in my ass just to get it to stop.” She giggled and Eskel felt himself chuckle weakly. “And farther up, almost lost to time, I have a scar from a mechanical pencil that sliced me from my pocket.” She pointed out the faint white scar. “Oh, and down here,” Becca pulled up the hem of her skirt to reveal her right knee. “I tripped and fell onto the asphalt going into student teaching one day. I bled the whole morning, and my students thought it was funny.” She smiled up at Eskel. “For a long time I had a scar on one of my knees from where I flipped over the handlebars of my bike because a car got too close to me on a bridge and I got scared, so I wrecked. Oh! And I have a scar on my upper thigh from a bedspring that cut me in the middle of the night.” Becca laughed.

  
“How does that even happen?” Eskel asked.

  
“It was an old mattress and there was a big worn hole in the middle. But it was my fault, I should have said something sooner.” Becca shrugged. “Oh! And on my little pinky,” she held up her left hand. “I took a huge chunk of skin out because I cut it on a serrated knife in the kitchen.” She looked at it thinking of the memory. “I was so young and scared. I was bleeding everywhere and I cried and cried... I probably should have gotten stitches for it, but now it’s this bump right on the side, where the finger bends.” Gently, Becca reached out and took Eskel’s hand. She drew his fingers over the scarred flesh of her pinky. Eskel didn’t flinch or draw back, just swept a finger back and forth over the raised flesh once or twice.

  
“One more,” Becca whispered. With a touch as light as air, she took hold of his hand. She drew her hair over and away from her left side. It was getting longer, Eskel noticed absently, but he watched carefully as Becca touched and pressed behind her left ear. Slowly, she drew Eskel’s hand up to touch too. He could barely notice it, but there was the slightest feeling of raised skin back there. Looking into his eyes and holding his hand to feel a scar that nobody could see, Becca spoke reverently. “When I was 12, I had surgery to create a new eardrum. The surgeon cut my ear almost clean off, and this scar runs the entire shell of it.”

  
Eskel barely moved. With his fingers brushing up against this scar he was practically caressing her face, and a small lick of emotion flared in his gut. 

  
“Don’t you see? Every scar tells a story.” Becca smiled and in that moment, between that short distance, it felt radiant. “So what if you have a few hundred more stories than I do? So what if they are more prominent than mine? Every scar is a testament to how we lived. They’re deeply personal, and sometimes they can hurt... but they don’t make you a monster.” Becca’s expression became even softer as she looked at Eskel. Her face spoke volumes of her devotion and trust. “Eskel, you could never be a monster to me.”

  
That simple statement pulled at something deeply lodged in Eskel. He thought back on all she had said, all she had ever done. As the thoughts became sharp in his mind he could feel a roiling in his gut and a thumping in his chest, and he wanted...

  
He wanted.

  
Becca sat there smiling at him, so soft, so genuine, caring so deeply, touching him, being touched without fear, and simply being kind to a man who had never allowed himself to desire anything. A man who had never dared to think he deserved something. And Eskel felt the familiar feelings he had fracture and grow into something knew. 

  
And oh, how he yearned.

  
“Thank you.” He whispered. But anymore, he couldn’t be sure what he was thanking her for.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would be lying if I tried to say that the scars featured in this are not actual things that have happened either to me or to people in my life. Sometimes you just cannot get any more creative and interesting than real life, you know?
> 
> And also, I mean yeah... really putting the slow in slow burn huh? Chapter 18????? 
> 
> You are so going to hate what comes next.


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You want to what?” Jaskier blinked, thoroughly confused. He looked to his left to see if Geralt had anymore clue what was happening, but the stoic expression and furrowed brow said that Geralt was also wondering what was happening. From a chair to his right, Jaskier watched Eskel draw a hand down his face and sigh. So all three of them were lost. 
> 
> OR  
> It's a request that takes them all by surprise, but what story would be incomplete without the obligatory friend trip?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm getting sad because every chapter brings us closer to the end. I want you all to like it as much as I do, but I'm still sad to know that sharing it with you will mean that the story is over.
> 
> With that being said, I'm sorry and I know that I have been terrible about updating, but it's all because I genuinely just don't want to draw closer to the end.
> 
> Even still, I submit this chapter about friends for you.

“You want to what?” Jaskier blinked, thoroughly confused. He looked to his left to see if Geralt had anymore clue what was happening, but the stoic expression and furrowed brow said that Geralt was also wondering what was happening. From a chair to his right, Jaskier watched Eskel draw a hand down his face and sigh. So all three of them were lost. Jaskier turned back to Becca, who had looked so sure just a moment ago. Her expression had slipped just slightly, but she stood her ground with hands on her hips.

“I said we should go camping! The four of us, it’ll be fun!” She looked at the three of them, beaming as if this was the most genius thing she had ever come up with. “Don’t tell me you’ve never been camping before.”

“Of course we’ve been camping.” Eskel sighed. “I mean, Jesus, we practically grew up and trained in the woods at Kaer Morhen.”

“My parents sent me to a sleep-away camp every summer from middle through high school.” Jaskier commented. Then, thinking on it more, “to be fair though, the only thing I really remember is making out with other campers in the tree-line.”

“Okay, I’m going to ask that there be a distinct lack of that during our trip, but before we move on just one question...” Becca cleared her throat. “Boys or girls?”

“Both.” Jaskier leaned back into the couch, smiling smugly.

“Can we focus?” Geralt huffed. “Becca, why do you want us to go camping together?”

“Because friends do stuff together! And besides, it will be fun, there’s a good campsite like an hour outside the city, I can borrow some tents from my family or a college friend, and camping is really inexpensive, and...” Becca looked at them all with a touch of regret. “I’ve been working a lot more lately, and I miss you all so much. Besides I really need to use the vacation days I’ve got built in, and August is a good camping month!”

“You... really want to go camping? Out of everything we could do?” Eskel asked dubiously. Becca just didn’t really seem the type to enjoy camping and the outdoors, but stranger things had happened.

“I haven’t been camping in YEARS!” She exclaimed. “The last time was at 18 when I volunteered for the local scout camp to work in the trading post.” Becca clasped her hands in front of her and pushed her bottom lip out, begging. “Please say yes, just for one weekend. I’ll make S’Mores for everyone, and there’s a reservoir for swimming if that’s your thing.”

“I don’t see why not,” Jaskier looked at the two other men, who were halfway to being convinced. “We could all use a bit of a break couldn’t we? And it’s not as if there’s a ton of commitment in just going camping. Right?”

~~~

  
It was a Friday morning and all four of them were working diligently to pack and load up Becca’s car. She had been volunteered into the position of driver out of the simple fact that she was the only one with a car and valid driver’s license. She had given the boys a long, withering stare at this news and commented something about being the only functional adult in the group. Now, she was anxiously buzzing around from room to room checking on each of their packing progress and muttering about being behind schedule.

  
“Behind schedule for what?” Eskel had taken her by the shoulders at one point and given her a soft look. “Relax busy-bee, it’s not like we’ll lose our spot.”

  
“You don’t know that.” She responded, frowning.

  
“I do.” Eskel assured her. “Because it’s the woods, and you don’t need a reservation.”

  
“But we said we would leave at 9 and it’s already 9:30, and-“

  
“Becca,” Eskel looked at her and gave her a little smile. “Relax, it’s okay. We’ll get there, and we don’t have to speed to do it. Now can you grab the food bags? I’ll take the cooler and we can Tetris the hatchback.” Becca cracked a smile and grabbed to two tote bags of food and supplies from the counter. Eskel picked up the cooler with ease, muscles flexing under the rolled sleeves of the checkered shirt Becca had insisted he wore. ‘It’s the perfect camping shirt! And we’ll match!’ They walked out to the car together and came upon Geralt and Jaskier arguing over the best place to put the tents. The set of Geralt’s jaw indicated that this argument had been happening for a while.

  
“Just put it diagonally! It will fit!” Jaskier shouted, gesturing to the car.

  
“You can’t put it sideways, because then you can’t put anything else in!” Geralt shouted back.

  
“Of course you can, just put things on top of them!”

  
“Why would you do that? They’re perfectly fine standing up along the side!”

  
“Hey hey hey!!” Becca squeezed between the two of them, trying to diffuse some tension. “It’s okay, don’t worry about it. I’ll figure it out, just go get some of the other stuff from inside.” Geralt huffed and walked away without another word. Jaskier, despite just shouting at him a moment ago, watched Geralt’s back appreciatively as he went.

  
“It’s hard to stay mad at him when he looks that good.”

  
“He’s wearing cargo shorts and flip flops.” Becca looked mildly disgusted. Of course love made a person blind to their partners flaws, but there were just so many things wrong with Geralt’s outfit.

  
“Well they can’t all be runway looks.” Jaskier sighed. Turning back to the hatchback he said, “Don’t worry, I’ve already got it figured out.”

  
“Oh, you mean like you’ve got that Hawaiian shirt figured out?” Becca quipped. Jaskier brushed over the front of his half open shirt, exposing more than a friendly amount of his naked chest and manly chest hair. “Uh huh, why don’t you let the experts take care of this.” Becca waved him off to gather more things from inside.

  
Eskel chuckled. “You sure told them.”

  
“Yeah well, they’ll be sharing a tent this weekend anyway. No doubt they’ll be working out some of their differences.”

  
“So, you’re okay with the two of us sharing a tent?” Eskel asked.

  
“Unless you’re gonna magic up a third one. And besides, do you want to spend the weekend sharing a tent with either one of them?”

  
“They’ll end up together anyway.” Eskel sighed. “You’re right, this is the best option.”

  
“It won’t be _THAT_ bad to bunk with me.” Becca shoved the tents to the side, standing up as Geralt really had been right, and spoke again. “I feel like the worst thing I could do is roll too close to you in the night.”

  
“Right.” Eskel set the cooler into the back. “I’ll find some way to forgive you for that.”

  
“Very funny.”

  
“This should be the last of it.” Jaskier called. As the two of them approached, conveniently Jaskier was carrying nothing as Geralt carried the remainder of their supplies.

  
“Then pass ‘em along and lock the door.” Becca replied.

  
“Done.” Geralt grunted.

  
“Then hop in the back.” She said.

  
“Why do we have to sit in the back?” Jaskier pouted.

  
“Unless you can find some way for both of you to sit in the passenger’s seat?” Becca regretted asking. The feral look on Jaskier’s face told her she really didn’t want to know. “Just get in the back.”

  
Becca and Eskel finished loading the last of the supplies and climbed into the car. Becca adjusted the rear view mirror while Eskel fastened his seatbelt, and when she made accidental eye contact with Geralt she beamed. Geralt, to his credit, let his lips tilt up just slightly before looking away. Becca started the car and fished around in the middle console for a few moments before pulling out a pair of aviator sunglasses.

“Oh, do you guys want sunglasses? I have a lot of different styles.”

  
“Why?” Eskel looked into the console which was filled most notably with many different pairs of sunglasses.

  
“I just keep finding cheap ones and putting them in my car, like to be prepared you know? Usually no one but me ever needs them, but now I have friends!” She smiled. “So, sunglasses?”

  
“Dibs on the bitchy 90’s looking ones.” Jaskier gleefully took the slim pointed glasses from Becca.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Personally I think camping doesn't get enough credit as the ideal friend vacation. You really can do just about anything you want. (Also you cannot tell me that Geralt wouldn't wear cargo shorts strictly because they're "Versatile" and "can carry a lot of things")
> 
> I hope that you read this chapter, knowing it is nearing the end, and tell me either what you liked, or about your own friends, or even what you think will happen in the last two chapters.
> 
> Comments are my lifeblood and will give me the strength I'll need to post this story. I really do hope you like and appreciate all of the work and love I've put into this and that you'll share that with me.


	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With a curious expression on her face she giggled.
> 
> Until it wasn’t funny any more.
> 
> “Oh.” That was all she said, face dawning realization.
> 
> OR  
> Things finally come to a head. There is only so long one can hold out from a beguiling smile.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is like the beginning of the downward descent. 
> 
> You'll finally see what I meant when I said that this was not a love story, but it has love in it.
> 
> Not all love is the same, after all, and to believe so is a gross oversimplification.
> 
> People are more complex than they often seem.

Camping was _SO_ much more fun when you were with your friends and allowed to drink. Becca howled with laughter for perhaps the dozenth time when Jaskier drank again in their game of ‘Never Have I Ever’. He led a very interesting life, but he had cycled through three beers already while everyone else was still on their first or second drink.

  
“I didn’t know the objective of the game was to get Jaskier more sloshed than the rest of us.” Eskel said mildly. Jaskier flipped him the bird, but play continued.

  
“Alright, okay...” Jaskier thought in preparation for his turn. “Never have I ever... bleached my hair.” Becca took a sip, frowning. “Seriously?”

  
“What? You think this is my natural color?” She pointed to the hair that she had clipped up. It was a kind of sandy blond, but the color was difficult to pin down in the firelight. “My roots are literally growing out.”

  
“Shockingly, you’re the only one.” Jaskier retorted. “No one else has taken colorant to their hair.”

  
“Not even Geralt?” Becca turned to look at him. 

  
He shook his head, and said very seriously, “It’s the trauma.”

  
“Damn,” Becca nodded slowly. “Cheers, my dude.” She clanked his beer with the bottom of her bottle and they both took a swig together.

  
“Geralt’s turn.” Jaskier prompted.

  
“Never have I ever slept with a succubus.” Geralt looked intently across the fire at Eskel. The man made a somewhat sour face and angrily took a drink from his bottle.

  
“Seriously?” Both Jaskier and Becca cried in tandem. 

  
“It was a long time ago.” Eskel muttered.

  
“What was it like?” Jaskier asked.

  
“Now is not the time.” Eskel said.

  
“Come on, we’re all friends here.” Jaskier pressed.

  
“I don’t feel like it.” Eskel looked away and nervously drank again. Jaskier was difficult to deter, but it was apparent it wasn’t the best time for that conversation.

  
“Hey Jas, you wanna see a magic trick?” Becca asked suddenly. Likely because he was twice as far along as the others, Jaskier nodded very enthusiastically. Becca moved carefully around the fire to squeeze in next to him. “Okay, on the count of three. Ready?” Jaskier watched her carefully. “One... Two... Three!” 

  
She quickly smacked the bottom of her bottle over the mouth of Jaskier’s own. The pressure caused Jaskier’s beer to fizz up and explode out the bottle in a volcano and Becca ran away crying with joy. Jaskier struggled to stop the flow of beer by putting the bottle into his mouth, but it proved to be too much for him and he coughed and sputtered.

  
“You bitch!” He shouted. Everyone else around the fire was having a good laugh. “I will get you for that.”

  
“Yeah I bet you will.” Becca wiped a tear away from her eye. “You spilled beer all over you, go change!”

  
“Fine. But I’m taking Geralt with me!”

  
“For what?” Becca asked incredulously.

  
“Never will I ever tell you.” Jaskier stuck out his tongue and grabbed Geralt by the arm. Geralt rolled his eyes, but stood to follow anyway. Becca and Eskel stayed sitting around the fire chuckling.

  
“That was brilliant.” Eskel commented once the two of them were far enough away.

  
“Yeah well, he deserved it.” Becca pushed around some of the burning wood in the fire with a long stick. “Obviously you didn’t wanna talk about the succubus.”

  
“Yeah.” Eskel watched Becca mess with the fire. For the first time in his long life he had felt ashamed of bedding the succubus. He knew deep down why Geralt had mentioned it, and Eskel swore he could curse the man. After watching Becca poke around in the fire for a bit he sighed.

  
“Penny for your thoughts?” Becca glanced at him briefly. She put the stick away and took another sip of her drink.

  
“It’s... nothin’.” Eskel smiled. “You just look really happy.”

  
“I am happy.” Becca looked at him and smiled even more. “I’m camping, with friends, and there’s alcohol, and you’re here.” She smiled again and Eskel was struck by the way that her eyes crinkled at the edges from her smiles. She did have rather nice eyes, nothing exceedingly unique about them, but Eskel could remember how kind and inviting they had always been. He liked them, he thought. They weren’t sitting very far apart, it wouldn’t be hard to lean forward and...

  
Eskel acted on instinct and moved. Becca moved backward in surprise, and then with a curious expression on her face she giggled.

  
_Until it wasn’t funny any more._

  
“Oh.” That was all she said, face dawning realization. “Oh. I’m sorry.”

  
“It’s fine.” Eskel covered. He sat back. “It’s fine.”

  
“No, no Eskel I’m sorry. I didn’t know-“

  
“It’s fine.”

  
“But it’s not. I really fucked that up.” Becca looked stricken. She didn’t know what to do. “You were... God, I’m so sorry.”

  
“Please, stop apologizing.”

  
“But I- I mean I didn’t mean to! I just-“ Becca’s eyes, the same ones he had been admiring before, began to grow wet with emotion. “I didn’t know that you-“

  
“What’s going on?” Jaskier was walking back. The two of them looked at him, very clearly in distress.

  
“It’s nothing.” Eskel said again.

  
“I, um...” Becca struggled to find anything to say.

  
“What happened?” Geralt approached, coming to stand behind Jaskier.

  
“It’s nothing!” Eskel said more forcefully.

  
Jaskier looked between the two at the fire, and he must have found something because suddenly he gasped “Oh.” He turned to Geralt, pressing at his chest to try to get him to move. “We shouldn’t-“

  
“What?” Geralt questioned, and Jaskier gave him a meaningful gaze. Geralt looked between the two again, searching. “Oh.”

  
“Don’t start.” Eskel warned.

  
“I didn’t...” Geralt sighed, unable to think of how to end that statement.

  
“We should go.” Jaskier said, pushing again.

  
“Oh... MY _GOD_!” Becca cried, covering her mortified face with her hands. “You are making this so much worse than it has to be!” She scrubbed her hands over her face, and when she pulled them back it was apparent that tears had begun to fall. “Eskel I am sorry!” She looked at him, sniffing. “It had nothing to do with you, I’m just an idiot. I didn’t know, I didn’t realize what was happening until it was too late.” She looked so sad and full of regret. Becca looked back to the fire as she continued. “I just, I don’t know if I’m ready. I don’t know if I’m really over the last person I really liked, which is crazy because it’s been, like, over a year. But I got my heart broken and I just...” Becca buried her face in her hands again.

  
“Becca it’s okay,” Jaskier tried to soothe her. “Do you wanna talk about it?”

  
“I... God, fuck, I have to.” Becca wipes at her face again. “It’s just... I met this girl online and we had some similar interests, so I started talking to her right? And she was really nice to me, saying I never bothered her and that she liked to talk to me, and just generally making me feel a lot of things that no one had made me feel before. So we became friends, and we started talking a lot more, and I developed a crush, but whatever right? I knew it probably wasn’t going to work out.

  
“But then one day she tells me she likes me too, so we were in this weird place and... and so I didn’t know what to do but I loved her! So this went on for like two years before she started to talk to me less and less, and I was so stupid! I should have seen it coming but I kept being just so nice and understanding, kept waiting and waiting. And the next thing I knew she wasn’t talking to me anymore, she was ghosting me, and she deleted like half of the social media’s I had her on. And I was just devastated because I should have known! But I was so fucking stupid and I got my heart broken, and I’ve just been fucked up about it ever since.”

  
Becca was actively weeping now. Through her hiccupping sobs she pressed out, “fuck, and that’s what my whole meltdown was about that night in the club. I’m just still hurting so bad, I guess. But Eskel, it has nothing to do with you!” She sniffled, but grasped his knee. “You didn’t do anything wrong, or cross any lines, and I really do like you! I do, I swear! And I’m sorry for making this so weird, but fuck, I’m just mortified. I got tricked and I’m still broken up about it.”

  
Eskel placed a hand over hers to try to offer some comfort. All of them stood there, processing and thinking as Becca shook and hiccupped. She had laid her soul bare in the middle of the woods and described possibly the worst thing she was dealing with alone, and none of them had any idea what to do to help her. 

  
“Becca, I... I’m sorry.” Jaskier regretted every moment he had tried to push her toward love or a new relationship. It all seemed so insensitive now. Heartbreak was painful no matter what happened, but heartbreak after two years of hope only to receive no explanation or catharsis? Jaskier couldn’t imagine the pain she must be going through.

  
“I’m just...” Becca huffed in frustration, tears still streaming down her face. “I just need to be alone for a bit.” She stood up and walked away from the fire, past their tents, and through the trees. Jaskier made a move to follow her, but Geralt stopped him. He shook his head, telling Jaskier not to follow, not now. The three men stayed there for a silent moment before Jaskier turned to the other casualty of the night.

  
“Eskel,” Jaskier began softly.

  
“I’m fine.” Eskel grunted. The set of his jaw belied the undercurrent of emotion coursing through him. In that moment, he truly wished that Witchers could not feel emotion. That would be so much easier than the pain.

  
“Eskel,” Jaskier sat down next to him. “You know it’s not your fault. And it wasn’t exactly a rejection.”

  
“Jaskier, just... stop.” Eskel pleaded.

  
“She cares about you so much, I mean it’s obvious. In a perfect world, it would have worked out. But everything is just so complicated with emotions right now...” Jaskier looked at Eskel, feeling useless. “It’s not you.”

  
“I said it’s fine.” Eskel said it again, and as he stood up to walk away Jaskier knew that that was the final word on it.

  
About twenty minutes later Geralt found Becca sitting down by the reservoir. Her face was rubbed raw, but she had stopped crying. Wordless, Geralt sat next to her. They sat in silence like that for a while, just listening to the sounds of nature.

  
“I just wish that I could love myself, you know?” Becca muttered the words. Geralt looked at her, still so sad, and placed an arm around her shoulders.

  
“So do I.” He said quietly. They sat there for a bit longer, saying nothing.

  
“They say it takes a year to get over someone that you truly loved. But no one said anything about how long it takes to pick up the pieces they left. To trust again.” Becca whispered. “God, I’ve totally screwed this up.”

  
“It’s not your fault.” Geralt told her. But it was difficult to believe him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Is it not enough to have two characters, both desperate to be loved, but tragically unable to be together?
> 
> When someone is so free with their affections, does it catch you off guard for them to hold back that one most crucial?
> 
> You'll have to tell me if I am any good at writing angst and sadness.
> 
> Also, if that past love scenario seems hella specific it's because it kind of is. But art draws from the deeply personal, no?


	21. Chapter 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You don’t have to do that.” He said.
> 
> “I don’t mind, like I said I was awake, so-“
> 
> “No,” Eskel interrupted. “You don’t have to pretend that everything is okay.”
> 
> OR  
> It's time to have a conversation like adults, and if you really care for someone then you say it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not gonna lie to you, writing and editing this chapter made me so sad. There's just a lot of stuff in here that I think everyone really deserves to hear from someone that says they care about them.
> 
> I'm also sad because I know what has to come next. The end.
> 
> Hopefully this chapter makes you feel a little better in some way.

When they had finally gone to bed that night, Jaskier climbed into the tent with Becca. They all knew why, it was better for everyone involved to try that much to diffuse the situation. Still, Becca felt a pain in her chest that she wouldn’t be able to talk to Eskel and apologize again, but she knew that they both needed space. She pulled the blankets up to her neck and rolled over, wishing to be alone as much as possible. And when she began crying again, late at night, without saying so much as a word Jaskier held her.

  
The next morning, Becca tried her best to compose herself and ran cool water over her cheeks to alleviate the irritation from crying herself to sleep. After she felt that she looked as presentable as she was going to get, she set to work on her task. It was still very early, and either none of her friends were awake or they were pointedly avoiding facing the day for a bit longer, but Becca felt more comfortable having something to do. Something to keep her mind from racing.

  
So she began to start their fire, to push the old ashes out and light a new one. This fire would not have the bitter reminder of the events that transpired over it. If Becca could just keep her face making the shape of a smile long enough, she was sure she could be happy that day. Her plan was working, the fire was started and she was cooking some breakfast for everyone, feeling alright and optimistic about the day.

  
“What are you doing?” The grumbling voice of Eskel, laden with sleep, almost startled her. But Becca widened her smile and brushed off the sad feelings.

  
“I’m making breakfast, since I’m already up.” She replied. Eskel approached and sat across the fire. He was quiet for a bit.

  
“You don’t have to do that.” He said.

  
“I don’t mind, like I said I was awake, so-“

  
“No,” Eskel interrupted. “You don’t have to pretend that everything is okay.” He looked at Becca, and the visible signs of his distress became apparent. The set of his jaw, the look in his eyes, and he was wearing the same clothes from yesterday. Becca’s smile faltered seeing how not-Fine things really were. “You don’t have to fake smile, or do things for everyone, or pretend that things have gone back to exactly the way they were.”

  
“So you could tell...” Becca mumbled.

  
“Your smile didn’t reach your eyes. And no one can get over a blow like last night. Not even me.”

  
“Eskel, I’m sorry-“ Becca began to feel her lip wobble and the threat of tears.

  
“Don’t apologize.” Eskel said. “It’s not your fault, and I can’t expect you to be anything more than what you are. And that’s okay, that’s enough.” Eskel looked at Becca as she valiantly tried to hold back her tears. Her face was growing red from the strain, and she was hardly breathing. With a soft smile Eskel looked into her eyes that had always reminded him of the forests of his boyhood at Kaer Morhen. He said, voice just above a whisper, “You’re enough, Becca. You’ve always been enough for me.”

  
Tears began to roll down her face, and as she sniffled Becca held herself back. “All I want is to hug you.”

  
“Then do it.” Eskel stood and opened his arms, within the second Becca was wrapped within them crying openly into his shirt. They held each other, waiting for the words to come more freely.

  
“Why do emotions have to be so complicated?” Becca laughed wetly from her place at Eskel’s chest. “And why do I have to have so many of them?”

  
“Destiny is cruel sometimes.” Eskel replied. He squeezed Becca tighter before pulling away to look at her. “I’m sorry that all of that happened to you, with your last love.” He said. Then with a deep severity in his voice, “I would- I will _NEVER_ do that to you. I swear it.”

  
“I know you won’t.” Becca said it so sweetly. She rubbed the tears from her eyes and looked up to Eskel with a more genuine smile. “I know you would never hurt me like that, because you would never do it intentionally.” She pulled him into a hug again. “And that makes all the difference.”

  
“You’ll forgive me my mistakes?” Eskel smiled.

  
“I’ll find some way.” Becca beamed. “And neither one of us will be perfect, but we’ll figure it out. You’re my friend first and foremost, and I love and care about you. No matter what. I’m always here for you, and I mean it.”

  
Eskel held onto her like something precious. He hoped that through it all, the sentiment became clear. _‘We’ll be alright. Do what you need to do.’_ “I’m here for you.”

  
Their breakfast was thoroughly ruined, but their relationship was beginning to heal.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What a penultimate chapter, right?
> 
> Just have to tie up a few loose ends now...
> 
> Allow to really express just how grateful and glad I am to every single person that picked up this story. I have never in my life finished a long multichapter work like this, but I was able to accomplish this one because of all your love and support. <3
> 
> I hope to see you around on the next story (wink wonk ;) ).


	22. Chapter 22

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The summer had passed, and Autumn was creeping its way back into the picture. It was a time for change, and like so many other things their relationship had changed too.
> 
> Whether it was for the better or worse no one could say just yet, but it was something that needed to be done. They had all promised to support one another in whatever they needed to do. And Becca needed to do this, for herself.
> 
> OR  
> An end, and a goodbye... for now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... Here we are.  
> The end of an epic tale.
> 
> Or at the very least the end of this story.
> 
> I would just like to take a moment to reiterate how thankful I am to everyone who even looked at this story, and express my unending gratitude to the people who faithfully followed the story and left comments. I sincerely would not have been able to accomplish this story without the sincerity of your comments and the idea that it might all be worth something. This story is ending, of course, but I hope to see you all soon in my next endeavor! Hopefully this will not be the last time that you see these characters.
> 
> In an effort to lessen the blow of the final chapter, I do have a small parting gift. It is my no means extraordinary, but it was made with love...
> 
> I give you,  
> [The Respect Doesn't Write History Playlist](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7JrnP18eIZbgcDavatE64c?si=G5pwKq6ZSuaViFBa30xfUA)
> 
> It's not much, but I hope it makes you feel things and feel connected to the story. 
> 
> I can't delay it any longer, so here is the end...

The summer had passed, and Autumn was creeping its way back into the picture. It was a time for change, and like so many other things their relationship had changed too.

  
Whether it was for the better or worse no one could say just yet, but it was something that needed to be done. They had all promised to support one another in whatever they needed to do. And Becca needed to do this, for herself.

  
Although it was painful, Eskel knew in his heart that he had meant it when he said that he would be there for her. So even as she picked up the parts of her life she had created to tackle the next challenge, Eskel remained steady despite the aching feeling in his chest. He tried to remind himself and the other two that it wasn’t a loss, no matter how much it felt like it.

  
“You _HAVE_ to leave?” Jaskier asked somberly for probably the millionth time.

  
“I have to.” Becca responded just as somberly. “But this isn’t goodbye! I’m not dying! I’ll still talk to all of you, you’re like my best friends.”

  
“Why do you have to leave?” Jaskier frowned sadly. “What does stupid grad school have that we don’t?”

  
“Well, a masters degree for starters.” Becca chuckled. “I just... I have to do this. For me.”

  
“I know...” Jaskier took her hands, looking at her sadly as if trying to commit her to memory. “But I’m going to miss you desperately.”

  
“Will you write a sad song about me?” Becca half smiled.

  
“I’ve already got one in the works.” Jaskier pulled her tightly into a hug. The two stayed like that for a few long moments, saying goodbye. Pulling away, Jaskier said, “You need to say goodbye to Eskel, he’s in the study.”

  
“Thanks, Jask.” Becca squeezed his hands. “When I’m gone... I am formally leaving you with my responsibilities. I know you can handle it.”

  
Leaving Jaskier to venture inside, Becca passed by Geralt in the kitchen making a valiant attempt to look unaffected. He had been the first to say goodbye, muttering something about needing to take care of some important business. Under that gruff exterior of his, he really was just a big softie who was sad to be losing a good friend. No matter how much he tried to conceal it. 

  
Becca walked to the study and stopped in the doorway. Inside, Eskel was sitting in a chair, looking blankly out the window. When Becca cleared her throat, he looked at her with a sad smile. “So you’ve come to say goodbye.”

  
“Not for forever.” Becca muttered, her own face falling. “Just for now.”

  
Eskel smiled. “You couldn’t have decided to go to graduate school before you walked into our lives?”

  
“Destiny has a way of really mixing things up, I guess.” Becca walked forward. “Put me in the path of the Alghoul, and our lives have been twisted ever since.” Reaching Eskel, Becca crouched before him in the chair. With a wicked little smile, she continued, “It wasn’t all bad though.”

  
“No.” Eskel smiled, then pushed a bit of hair behind Becca’s left ear. “I can think of some good parts.”

  
Becca took his hand from her face and held it. “I brought you something.” She said quietly. Slowly, with the sun filtering through the window, she reached for her bag. Pulling something from it, she laid the gift in Eskel’s lap.

  
“What is this?” Eskel’s brows came together. Looking between the gift and Becca, he tried to discern an answer.

  
“Turn it over.” Becca mumbled with an easy smile on her face. Eskel turned the gift over and read the front of it. 

  
_**The Witcher:** an Incomplete History_

  
Eskel felt time slow in that moment, and if he didn’t know any better he would say that there was some magic afoot. He looked up to Becca who just kept smiling at him. 

  
“But... your career.” He said.

  
“I’ll make it on my own merits.” Becca assured him. “And besides, I think it will be most appreciated right here. With you.”

  
Eskel looked at her for a moment, before a huff pushed its way out.

  
“Is this supposed to be like some sort of consolation prize?” He laughed.

  
“God, no!” Becca laughed with him. “No, it’d be kind of a shitty one, wouldn’t it?”

  
“It would.” Eskel chuckled.

  
“No, it’s just a gift.” Becca asserted. “From one friend to another.” The look on Eskel’s face must have betrayed him, because in a moment Becca was standing, holding his face fearlessly between her two soft palms. With a sad smile she kissed his cheek and pressed their foreheads together, still cradling his face. 

  
“It wasn’t our time.” She whispered. Eskel sighed and let his arms wrap around her. If she was leaving he wanted to hold her one more time.

  
“I know.” He said regretfully. There was nothing that he could do. Becca; kind, soft, gentle, Becca, had made up her mind, and Eskel was not about to stop her. 

_Because when you love something, you let it go..._

  
_**END**_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you again for reading. 
> 
> This story has been my world, and I am grateful to be given the opportunity to share it with you.
> 
> Now go... and write your own history.
> 
> I'll be waiting to see you again. ;)


End file.
